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massage boner

A massage boner in an uncontrollable erection you get on the massage table if anything or anyone comes even close to your junk. It's unavoidable and potentially embarrassing when this happens, especially if the massage is done by a dude.
Robin: Was so embarrassed last night.
Reg: Why ?
Robin: Man, I went for a massage and it was a dude. Couldn't help getting the hugest massage boner when he rubbed my thighs and his elbow brushed my junk. Wouldn't settle down for 10 minutes.
Reg: Did he finish it off?
Robin: Hell no.
by Paastastic7 June 13, 2013
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mahogany boner

The hardest erection a human male can achieve. If you drop a mahogany on a bitch, you'll tear that pussy up with your rock hard cock.
TJ: Jenny just gave me the biggest fucking mahogany boner of my life.
Jeffrey: Nigga fuck you and your baby carrot dick.
by 420 BLAZER September 10, 2013
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bean boner

"That guy is so sexy, I think I have might have a bean boner"
by St. Patty December 6, 2013
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skank boner

Getting sexually aroused when in the presence of a skanky women.
Seeing her at the bar he thought she might be a hooker or stripper but as he stared at her bony body, fake tits and numerous tattoos he could feel himself getting aroused. When she pulled his head down in to her boobs then showed him her genital piercings he found himself with a huge skank boner.
by Tycho_B February 2, 2014
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excel boner

To be impressed by, envious of, or aroused by a spreadsheet. Most common in cases where the Excel document contains VB Script or some other sophisticated functionality.
VLOOKUPs give me an Excel boner.
by halee June 10, 2014
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Enacta-boner

The excitement that one feel's upon hearing that Enactus has done something awesome.
I'm going to have such an Enacta-boner when we win National's this year!
by samwise102 December 1, 2014
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Illinois Boner Joint

Illinois boner joint:
An Illinois boner joint Is when a homeless man offers you a joint offered at the waist for a puff of the reef, where the joint is actually his homeless wang wrapped in rolling paper for sexual gratification.
When I was in Chicago late at night walking around with my friend, a homeless man appeared from the shadows and offered us a hit from his joint. I knew immediately he was a sick bastard trying to get us to suck his wang, thinking it was a meaty joint, my friend bent down to puff I yelled "NOO!! Stop! That's an Illinois boner joint!" As I dove and pushed my friend away from the homeless mans pelvis and erect reefer wrap.
by LtPork April 22, 2015
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