Jan-Malte is a guy, typically looking for a German guy (blonde hair and the most beautiful eyes). You can usually find Jan-Malte sleeping, plazing with animals or doing German things like drinking beer. He is a crazy good cook, but be careful because when he is cooking you are not allowed to touch anything in the kitchen. Anyway, the only thing you really want to touch is him because Jan-Malte is a hottie. He is mostly a laid back guy who you can enjoy life with.
by gabsyy January 8, 2025
Get the Jan-Malte mug.Jan-Malte is a guy, typically looking for a German guy (blonde hair and the most beautiful bluish eyes). You can usually find Jan-Malte sleeping, playing with animals or doing German things like drinking beer. He is a crazy good cook, but be careful because when he is cooking you are not allowed to touch anything in the kitchen. Anyway, the only thing you really want to touch is him because Jan-Malte is a hottie. He is mostly a laid back guy who you can enjoy life with.
by gabsyy January 8, 2025
Get the Jan-Malte mug.Dirty Malte
A sexual fetish where those bleeding from the anus experience a heightened orgasm while receiving anal sex and watching videos of Greta Thunberg’s climate change speech at the UN.
A sexual fetish where those bleeding from the anus experience a heightened orgasm while receiving anal sex and watching videos of Greta Thunberg’s climate change speech at the UN.
Woman - Babe my ass is bleeding… can you give me a Dirty Malte?
Man - I’d love to give you a Dirty Malte babe!
Man - I’d love to give you a Dirty Malte babe!
by Straya11 February 7, 2025
Get the Dirty Malte mug.The ascension phase that proceeds after the act of moon gooning.
One who goons to completion will not be able to achieve Abliteragato mantera sudareche.
One who goons to completion will not be able to achieve Abliteragato mantera sudareche.
by IrishGareBear January 16, 2026
Get the Abliteragato mantera sudareche mug.The act of shiting oneself in fear so much that you can't retain control of your asshole and so little globs of malteser shaped poo come out uncontrollably.
by SebilCrostar August 7, 2025
Get the Puckering Maltesers mug.A friend, let's call him Maarten, and you decide to meet up for a spliff. You're at the meeting point, the spliff ir rolled, litten and abut to be inhaled. Maarten is late.... an hour late.... a few hours late. You have tried calling him several times but nobody answers. After 12984723894 hours, you get a text from Maarten claiming he is sick and is not coming today (which was pretty obvious by then anyways). This is 'pulling a maarten' and the lesson is that when you are sick, you are not able to call people to let them know in time!!!
by SAJEMA October 21, 2010
Get the Pulling a Maarten mug.To kill oneself using means of drugged sweets
To avoid a problem
A man gives you slightly warm maltesers and you question why they are warm
When you’re tired of a situation, the option is there
To avoid a problem
A man gives you slightly warm maltesers and you question why they are warm
When you’re tired of a situation, the option is there
Ah yeah, Johnny, did you not hear? He popped a malteser last week
This coffee shop makes me wanna pop a malteser
This coffee shop makes me wanna pop a malteser
by Barney_the_dinosaur November 23, 2021
Get the Pop a Malteser mug.