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clutch monkey

A godly person who never chokes under pressure is clutch
it's a squad vs solo don't worry he got it he's a clutch monkey
by 4nite March 19, 2018
mugGet the clutch monkeymug.
A manufactured problem, one that is easy to solve but not convient to the person responsible for manufacturing it. Normally it's a self solving problem, often created by management level decision makers, and would potentially negatively affect the person being asked for help in solving the problem. Artificial urgency is often imparted bu the bowling ball owner, along with the inability to self rescue & lack of understanding about the basic problem and their part in it.

A monkey would be done enjoying the bowling ball in time, without need or risk to the person trying to stop the monkey. It may attack, bite or otherwise retaliate if interrupted, but by waiting it will simply go away.

Mammals don't respond well to coitus interruptus, a bowling ball can be washed later with no risk to the person being asked for help.
A couple saw a cute bear in the park and stopped to feed it. The bear decided to finish eating their picnic basket, in the back seat. In a hurry to leave called the park rangers "Just wait a while, the bear will finish up and leave' the ranger suggested, and turning to their coworker says 'monkey fucking a bowling ball'
by anonymous November 15, 2025
mugGet the Monkey fucking a bowling ballmug.

monkey slide

A monkey slide means an old metal playground slide in piece of vintage playground equipment from years ago between the Early 1900s to the 1990s.
An old Metal Slide in an Old Playground is a monkey slide.
by Tominator 1401. May 5, 2018
mugGet the monkey slidemug.

Monkey

Josh the monkey oh the little monkey that gets abused by girls. Wears lots of adidas. Cares about his hair but doesn’t take care of it. Like to watching the fucking same movie like 3 times. The kid who sleeps with pillows between his legs. The type of fatass that takes 2 steps and gets tired. Has a Spotify list that has over 4000 songs and albums and songs. Who likes tacos and cheeseburgers. Who goes to the movies like every fucking 3000 years.
Monkey ate all my chicken. Monkey saw Eduardo take 3 steps and destroy the world.
by Baddibixch September 27, 2019
mugGet the Monkeymug.

chucking the monkey

Pitched at a GTLive Stream during a playthrough of Little Nightmares. Though no explicit definition was given, context provided by MatPat and Steph suggests it is a euphemism for masturbation. Repeated remarks about both of them chucking their monkeys warranted a mature stream warning. They talked about not chukcing the monkey in front of an audience and equal chucking the monkey rights.
Person 1: Ugh I'm so stressed right now.
Person 2: Try putting on some porn and chucking the monkey. It always helps me relax.
mugGet the chucking the monkeymug.

monkey nut

like a dumbass who acts like a monkey would

alternatively, what a british person would call peanuts because they give them to monkeys in the zoo
"ayo monkey nut come get over here"
"this kids a fuckin monkey nut"
random:"fuck you monkey nut" you:"the fuck you say to me cuh??"

alt: "can i get some monkey nuts please"
by teachannnn January 20, 2023
mugGet the monkey nutmug.

Sea Monkey Stampede

Right to sleep last night........had an unscheduled Sea Monkey Stampede.
by Johannes Baptine March 14, 2023
mugGet the Sea Monkey Stampedemug.

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