The perpetually petulant, paranoid and pessimistic petite misanthropic manlet is an isolated loner manlet who childishly shuns the company of grown-ups and instead prefers to focus his girlishly giddy energy on pursuing his numerous hobbies, including but not limited to: alcoholism, compulsively measuring his immutably dwarfed height every five minutes, e-shopping for children's clothes and high heels, daydreaming about getting pegged by a seven-foot tall dominatrix while he sings Short People in his high-pitched and squeaky-voiced manletspeak, performing delusional height increasing stretching exercises while listening to Skee-Lo's "I wish" and wearing nothing but high heels and a training bra, venting his manlet rage by ranting about how all women (righteously) reject and laugh at him at his local Bagel Boss and putting the finishing touches on his manlet manifesto before shooting up his favorite Barbie Dreamhouse due to the Barbie doll he was crushing on calling him an inherently effeminate, microscopically infinitesimal stunted beastling of a sissy manlet boy when she caught him in the Dreamhouse manlet pit as the deranged low IQ manlet was stupidly attempting to give the, by comparison towering, Ken doll a standing blowjob.
Emma: Lol, why is that misanthropic manlet furiously dry humping that garden gnome over there? Allison: It's because manlets can't be choosers. Emma: Short people got nobody. Allison: Hahahahaha!
by ManletDepreciator September 11, 2024
Get the misanthropic manletmug. A grotesquely gnomish gaggle of ganged-up, overcompensating turbo-manlets who have, in a childish, desperate and doomed attempt at overcoming their crippling manletism, decided to form a midget gang. Once a diminutively dwarfed new recruit has been sexed-into the gang, it is mandatory for him to participate in typical gang activities, for example: tagging up turf by spray-painting garden gnomes at knee height onto garbage cans and pet doors, drinking Tall Boys and huffing Jenkem, prancing around naked except for high heels and assless chaps in their hobbit-hole of a gang hideout while towel snapping each other's posteriors in an effort to toughen themselves up, telling deeply embarrassing tall tales about how they used to be the biggest kid in preschool, injecting themselves with stolen bovine somatotropin in a futile and injudicious bid at escaping their inevitable fate of becoming a prison wife manlet once caught by the law and incarcerated and frantically praying in front of the countless Randy Newman posters adorning the walls of the manlet pit in their hobbit-hole gang hideout while repetitively reciting the lyrics of their favorite song Short People due to their shared obsession with the delusional hope of being blessed with an adult-onset growth spurt by their beloved God and hero Saint Newman.
Jessica: Lol, why are there a bunch of garden gnomes standing on the corner over there? Olivia: It's just a Short People manlet gang. Here, take my magnifying glass and have a closer look. Can you see that they got little hands, little eyes, that they walk around tellin' great big lies? They got little noses and tiny little teeth. Unsurprisingly they wear platform shoes on their nasty, little feet. Jessica: Oh yeah, they got little baby legs and they stand so low - I'd have to pick one of them up just to say hello! Olivia: Well, I don't want no short people 'round here. Jessica: Short people got no reason.
by ManletDepreciator September 11, 2024
Get the Short People manlet gangmug. The rubber band manlet (a dwarfed male shorter than 5ft10) is a mobbed-up manlet, a misanthropic manlet, a materialistic manlet and a myopic manlet who petulantly peddles his piddly hobbit pipe-weed to all of the towering grown-ups who have the misfortune of crossing his pathetically puny path. Straight outta Oompa Loompa land, tape measure in his right, booster seat in his other hand. Call him a lesser man, he'll always be a lesser man. Wasted a couple hundred grand, high heels, all colors man. Once inevitably caught by the ever-watchful Manlet Detection Agency, the then incarcerated rubber band manlet instantly and seamlessly makes the for him natural transition into a prison wife manlet and happily lives out his laughably lowly little life in the enthusiastically submissive service of his fearlessly formidable and devastatingly dominant, supremely superior magnificent manmore prison war daddy overlord.
Emily: Lol, why is that deceased rubber band manlet lying in the manlet pit over there and why is he covered with garden gnomes? Bianca: A group of little girls just shot him to death with a pink BB gun and then gave the silly, little manlet boy a dwarven funeral. Emily: Hahahahaha! Manlets rise up!
by ManletDepreciator October 10, 2024
Get the Rubber Band Manletmug. The infinitesimal murloc manlet is a dwarfed beastling of a moronic manlet boy who, after suffering through a ludicrous lifetime of well-deserved humiliations and rejections inflicted on him by society as a whole but especially women, has chosen to pursue a sub-aquatic lifestyle, only venturing onto dry land to take part in mortifying prearranged monthly manlet mating rituals in front of basketball arenas and microbiology labs. Once underwater the microscopic murloc manlet quickly adapts to his new environment by eagerly embracing his naturally menial role as a proctologist cleaner fish and feverishly feasts on the rectums and fecal matter of all of the much larger sea creatures in the vicinity. Often falling prey to seagulls, seahorses, fin rot, sunburn, aggressive mating attempts by other murloc manlets, Napoleon complex psychosis, diarrhea and to being caught and eaten alive by prowling grizzly bears and manmores who hunt by the riverbank - the life of a murloc manlet is short, just like the silly murloc manlet itself. Consequently the minuscule murloc manlet eternally resides at the very bottom of the undersea food chain, thereby ironically replicating the lamentably and laughably lowly life that the severely stunted sissy manlet sought to escape from in the first place and in doing so once again proving that height is everything. Manlets, when will they learn?
Emma: Hey, why is that frog floating face down in that puddle over there? Aubrey: Yuck! Manlet detected. It's a deceased murloc manlet. Emma: Just gross! I think he choked to death on that pellet of rabbit poop floating there next to him. Aubrey: Manlets BTFO. Truly a befitting end for a manlet. Emma: Lol, so true.
by ManletDepreciator September 1, 2024
Get the murloc manletmug. The highly entertaining, hilarious and trendy new sport of manlet tossing, which is surely soon to be recognized by the International Olympic Committee as an Olympic sport, consists of two or more competitors who take turns selecting a captured manlet out of the manlet pile in the adjacent manlet pit, to then effortlessly lift the pint-sized pipsqueak peewee manlet up onto their shoulders, before subsequently tossing the dwarfishly diminutive, stunted little manlet boy as far as they possibly can. If most of the onlookers refrain from urinating into the manlet pit over the course of the competition, then the kidnapped manlets will even agree to sing their favorite song Short People in veneration of their God and hero Randy Newman as they are being hurled through the air!
Manmore 1: Hey, why is that group of children standing around in that parking lot over there? Manmore 2: They seem to be engaging in the universally popular new sport of manlet tossing. Lol, that little girl just threw a subhumanly stunted squealing sissy manlet clear across the parking lot into a nearby trashcan, where he obviously belongs! Manmore 1: Gold medal! Manmore 2: Manlets BTFO.
by ManletDepreciator October 1, 2024
Get the manlet tossingmug. The martial arts manlet is a minuscule and utterly insignificant manlet, who has, in an absolutely futile attempt at overcoming his insurmountably devastating manletism, hilariously decided that in order to bolster his notoriously fragile self-esteem and in a laughably delusional effort at competing with the towering manmores that terrify him, he should pursue an ill-fated career in martial arts. Closely related to the stubby and microscopic, gym coping manlet pit dweller, the overcompensating martial arts manlet can often be found engaging in mortifying public catfights with other martial arts manlets, throwing a hissy fit after being bullied by other children or crying bitter tears of manlet rage after having once again been soundly and easily defeated by a laughing manmore. Willfully ignorant of the plainly obvious truth that no amount of time wasted by bodybuilding or sparring will change the fact that he is a dwarfishly stunted, elflike and inherently effeminate runt of a sissy manlet boy who would be the belle of the ball in a women's prison, the Napoleon complex-driven martial arts manlet personifies peak manletism.
Lol, why is that spandex wearing turbo-manlet twirling around beneath that table lamp while blasting Short People over there? I think the silly martial arts manlet is shadow-boxing. Eye of the Manlet. Hahahahaha!
by ManletDepreciator August 21, 2024
Get the martial arts manletmug. A male that is 4ft11 to 5ft4 is a turbo-manlet. As a particularly stunted member of the manlet family, the turbo-manlet eternally resides at the very bottom of the social food chain. Inflicted with catastrophic levels of manletism, the turbo-manlet harbors what can (ironically) only be described as a colossal hatred for women and society but mostly for himself. Utterly insignificant, deeply insecure, inherently effeminate and unquestionably pathetic, the turbo-manlet represents the quintessence of manletism.
by ManletDepreciator July 28, 2024
Get the Turbo-manletmug.