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I am in constant agony. My life is a mess. As a kid I had a natural aptitude for math and science, but I let it get to my head, ultimately ruining my possibility to go to college.

I wasted my life playing video games and watching the television; the natural talents I once had have apathied and worn away, leaving the one thing I was good at behind.

My life has been nothing but a fastly accelerating downward spiral and I have failed to provide anything of with to anyone.
Isaiah: Hey, Ed! Haven't seen you in a few years, how are you don't?

Me: I am in constant agony, this is not a joke; please help me.

Isaiah: ...
Me: ...
Isaiah: yeah, same.
by MrDrEdward October 31, 2021
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consultant

A man who knows 500 different ways to make love, but doesn't know any women.
The gov't. mistakenly hired a plethora of consultants to find a solution to the problem.
by Richard Kirshen October 24, 2003
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management consultant

Someone who works for a management consulting firm. The consultant gets paid about 10% of what the firm charges the client for the consultants services. For example, the firm may charge the client $9,000 a week for the consultant but pays the consultant about $900 a week. A lot of consultants have never had any experience with the type of work that the client does.

The lifestyle at some firms consists of 100% travel. You leave on Sunday and come back on Friday. The travel and hotel are paid for and the consultant gets to keep the airline miles and hotel points. There is also per diem. The day can start at 630 AM when you meet with your team in the hotel lobby to leave for work. The clients site may be anywhere from 15 minutes to 45 minutes away. The clients provide the consultants with a makeshift office. The consultant may not get back to the hotel until 6PM.

The consultant is usually part of a team. The team leader may be someone with just a couple more years experience. Training tends to be on-the-job. There can be intense, almost violent, conflicts within the team and between a consultant and people who work in the client company.

A consultant is the lowest rung in the ladder, then comes project manager, then the guy who is managing multiple projects at the same time, then ultimately partner.

Most of the money is made from bonuses. A project manager may earn 65K but make a couple thousand in bonus money. Even people high in the ladder may make "only" about 90K but more than make up for it in bonuses.

It is difficult to explain what a management consultant does. There are some on-the-floor observations of what the client company does. There is interviewing of some people who work for the client. There is use of computers and installing new programs. The consultant recommends changes and try to implement them.The consultant seems to have to create his own work.
The "Bobs" in the movie Office Space were management consultants.
by Jose Miura October 14, 2006
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constantine

Crazy white boy who goes to hell and beats bitches up with a golden shotgun
Constantine:i told you to move the car
side kick:if i knew you where tossing a demon in a mirror i would have moved it further
by Nick March 6, 2005
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Constantinople

Capital of the Byzantine Empire. Was established as New Rome by Constantine the Great in the 4th century A.D. (The Byzantine Empire was actually the Greek-speaking Eastern half of the Ancient Roman Empire, which offically fell in 476 A.D., with the deposition of Romulus Augustus.)Constantinople became the center of Orthodox Christianity after the Great Schism of 1054. Constaninople was sacked in 1204 by Western invaders during the 4th crusade, who then established the "Latin Empire." Even though Constantinople was retaken by its rightful owners in 1261, it never again regained its former glory. The weakened city was taken by the opportunistic Ottomans less than 200 years later, in 1453. Now in a state of disarray, the city of Constantinople is called "Istanbul" by it's Ottoman occupants. It is understood by most and argued by many that Constantinople is the rightful property of Greece. It is the opinion of many that the Turkish government should give back what wasn't theirs to take in the first place.
Since then, the Ottoman Empire has fallen, and the upstarts that inherited the broken nation seem to think they still have a right to be in Constantinople.
by Nial of the Ranseur October 8, 2007
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constantiam

An online community of Bangladeshi Kite testing connoisseurs and other cultured men.
niggers tongue your anus on constantiam
by boggaogga November 10, 2019
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happiness consultant

I need to phone for a meeting with my happiness consultant.
by OKCAvenger November 26, 2013
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