Social Life 

A social life is a serious condition that involves an excessive amount of time spent with others. Some symptoms include friendships, partying, sexual relationships, and sexual intercourse. Social lives are dangerous because they can create a loss of video game progress, an important form of development, and they cause a gradual loss of fine-motor skills that are critical for gaming. People with a social life often drink excessively, which can cause a higher amount of alcohol in the blood. Sexual intercourse can dangerously result in sexually-transmitted diseases. These are just some of the many symptoms of a social life.

Diagnostic Criteria

The sufferer is often referred to as a "noob" in online games.

The sufferer spends too much time with others.

The sufferer has stopped masturbating as much.

The sufferer has a compulsion to spend time with others.

If you, or someone you know online is suffering from a social life, do not worry, there are many therapeutic procedures that can cure the victim of a social life. One method of therapy is online gaming. The sufferer will quickly lose the social life. Another method of therapy is Internet pornography. These are just some of the many procedures to cure a social life. A social life is a serious condition that can be easily cured.

John got a girlfriend, so rapid intervention was imperative to cure him of a social life.

Social Life by Jack41EL November 28, 2013

social anxiety 

Characterized by extreme self-consciousness. A condition in which the subject may be consistently nervous, fearing judgement and over-rationalizing, taking things apart to much, often worrying about what others may think of them, not to mention feeling like they are always being looked at.

I think that wierd guy who comes in here now and then, the one who always seems kind of nervous and doesn't make eye contact, has social anxiety. Sucks.

All socially anxious people should unite and start a community together. Approach your fellow nervous wreck. Also, socially anxious people should all date each other, because it's near impossible to get along with others. Fuck everyone else, there's nothing wrong with us.

social anxiety by Chuck October 5, 2003

Social Media 

Online networks where both adolescents and young adults go to express one of two statements:

1) "I'm complaining about my boring, shitty life." Used as an alternative to actually making life interesting.

2) "Look how superior my boring, shitty life is to your boring, shitty life" Used to passively belittle the only 250 people the individual knows.

Also used by middle aged adults mostly to post pictures of cats.

Popular websites are Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.

Person 1: "I'm insecure about my life so I will post a picture on the social media site Facebook, of me having a great time. Although, most of that time was pretty shitty."
Person 2: *sees picture* "Wow, my life is pretty shitty compared to theirs."

Person 3: "I hate my job because I'm uneducated and nobody ever taught me how to work hard. I think I will tweet about it on the social media site Twitter, so maybe people will pity me."

Person 2: *reads tweet* "At least my life isn't that shitty."

Social Media by I Hate my Generation December 16, 2013

social headlock 

Getting monopolized at a party by a boring person that just won't let you go.

No, I didn't see Dale drop his pants, Faye had me in a social headlock most of the night.

social headlock by puddykast August 7, 2009

Social Points 

Points you score when initiating a conversation with a group of people to whom you feel an irrational connection with

I'm gonna go over there and ask Ricardo about senior classes just to score some Social Points

Social Points by -quietplease- April 12, 2010

Social Under Armour

Under Armour sports apparel that is inappropriately worn during public, non-sporting events (eg: bars, parties, classroom, restaurants, etc) in an attempt to pass it off as fashionable.

Chris: "Look at that douche bag wearing Social Under Armour."

Pete: "No wonder he is alone."

Social Under Armour by Lafferty Daniel October 1, 2008