Jared

The most Jared thing a Jared could ever do is be named Jared. They are constantly taking bathroom breaks each one longer then the last. They are experts in the arts of PC building and take pride in the fact that they know how to build a Lego or two (thanks to an engineering background). Expect them to talk about their Linus Tech Tips water bottle every now and then. That is just the Jared way.

Wow, is that guy who built is own PC out of nothing but dirt and grass? He's such a Jared!

by wordsarentreal78 April 12, 2022

Jared

a submissive and breedable nerdy man.

someone: man, Jared is so submissive and breedable.
friend: yeah, he’s a total nerd too.

by B0WT13S November 3, 2021

Jared

A guy who likes daisy

Damn Jared likes daisy

by Eeqwsfew November 4, 2021

Jared

This man one bold ass mf like bro lost his hairs to a cracked out barber bro.

Person1: That guy got a jared.
Person 2: damn wtf, his barber be on that crack head shit!

by Jumping jackin mf November 21, 2021

Jared Dixon

bald.

Person 1: Who’s that bald guy over there ?
person 2: that’s obviously Jared Dixon.

by someone who isn’t bald November 21, 2021

Mayonnaise jaring

The act of nutting in one’s butt then shoving a butt plug in the hole.

Person: Hey did you know George is well known for mayonnaise jaring?

Other Person: Really! I better go ask if he’s taking appointments!

by chumpaIumpa March 21, 2022

Pulling a Jared

When you take too much of a substance you do or don't know the content of and start straight salmon-ing on the floor

Person #1: Yo man I haven't seen Tiffany at school in like 3 days, have you heard from her?
Person #2: Idk man but I heard rumors that she ended up pulling a jared.

by LevMehArone January 25, 2022