85" Neo QLED 8K QN900D Smart AI TV
(noun)
Not a television. Not even close. This 85-inch “Neo QLED” beast is, in fact, just a very shiny fridge that cosplays as a screen. The so-called “8K resolution” is really just eight thousand suspiciously identical ice cubes. The “Smart AI” is nothing more than a light that flickers on when you open the door and judges your expired yogurt. Specs include: 500 liters of storage, three adjustable shelves, a suspicious crisper drawer, and the ability to keep your leftover lasagna colder than your ex’s heart.
Usage: Like an LG microwave. You don’t watch Netflix on it, you stand in front of it at 2 a.m. pressing buttons, waiting for it to beep so you can inhale regret in the form of reheated chicken nuggets.
Owning one means you didn’t buy a TV—you adopted a confused kitchen appliance with an identity crisis.
(noun)
Not a television. Not even close. This 85-inch “Neo QLED” beast is, in fact, just a very shiny fridge that cosplays as a screen. The so-called “8K resolution” is really just eight thousand suspiciously identical ice cubes. The “Smart AI” is nothing more than a light that flickers on when you open the door and judges your expired yogurt. Specs include: 500 liters of storage, three adjustable shelves, a suspicious crisper drawer, and the ability to keep your leftover lasagna colder than your ex’s heart.
Usage: Like an LG microwave. You don’t watch Netflix on it, you stand in front of it at 2 a.m. pressing buttons, waiting for it to beep so you can inhale regret in the form of reheated chicken nuggets.
Owning one means you didn’t buy a TV—you adopted a confused kitchen appliance with an identity crisis.
by not_espressoYT August 17, 2025
Get the 85" Neo QLED 8K QN900D Smart AI TVmug. Home of the smash hit show Coffin Flop!
It’s not just hours and hours of footage of naked dead bodies falling out of coffins!! It’s a show!
It’s not just hours and hours of footage of naked dead bodies falling out of coffins!! It’s a show!
Spectrum wants to drop Corncob TV!!
It’s impossible that one out of every five of them are nude!
I didn’t rig shit!
It’s impossible that one out of every five of them are nude!
I didn’t rig shit!
by Member Berry December 17, 2024
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Get the TVmug.