sperm shields

Large Jackie-O style sunglasses that all the New Jersey sluts wear. Often accompanied by a tramp stamp and botox.

Danielle was wearing a pair of Gucci sperm shields when we were at Temps this summer

by NickG0529 November 2, 2006

Cunt Shield

Term for an older insecure boyfriend to protect his younger girlfriend from interested boys, otherwise known as a cunt shield

he's a right cunt shield

by kp13 August 20, 2009

semi-shaped 2x4 and commie steel

any soviet or russian military firearm that infects this world-

much hated by Americans.

the semi shaped 2x4 comes from the stock while the commie steel comes from the barreled action.

the communist picked up his semi-shaped 2x4 and commie steel and died when it blew up in his face

by just a good ol' boy May 27, 2011

softball shape

A state of being where one is almost always ready and able to stand in one spot for long periods of time, wearing a softball glove in one hand, and a warm, stale Olde English 800 in the other hand.

Dave had been training for months to be in softball shape, and now given his morbid obesity and alcoholism issues, he was finally ready.

by Iwantsomerocks June 5, 2013

real-shape

To take its proper shape, used when referring to the anatomical length and trajectory of a woman's vagina. Traditionally in homo sapiens the sexual stimulation of a female will result in the lengthening and expansion of the vaginal vault to allow for an erect pens to enter.

"Trev, what happened with you and jess last night? She looked to be in a right state this morning.."
"Ahhh yes I tried giving the D without properly warming her up if you catch my drift, bruised her cervix bad. Should of real-shaped her first with a bit of oral like!"

by motherbitchesralphsrinandben April 4, 2015

rough shape

(Adj.) A word used to describe someone or something that seems "out of sorts" or "upside down". May be used as an adjective, noun, or verb.

"wow Mark, you're in rough shape today"
"yeah, a shark bit me"

by gdmoney March 21, 2017

shit paper shield

noun. barrier a person, usually suffering from some level of OCD, erects between their bare ass before being seated to drop the kids off at the pool (take a shit). usually construced with toilet paper unless the seat wrappers are provided.

Carl: I got to go drop a deuce!

Heather: don't forget to build your shit paper shield OCD boy.

by DaStalka June 3, 2010