super extremely hot sexy guy that everyone finds attractive. also known as “aloonamoon”. all
his friends want to fuck him so god damn bad but he kindly says no everytime. all the girls fall for him and want to suck his 20 incher.alan is the coolest guy you’ll ever meet but he’ll be shy at first 🗿 please follow @alanbsantamaria
his friends want to fuck him so god damn bad but he kindly says no everytime. all the girls fall for him and want to suck his 20 incher.alan is the coolest guy you’ll ever meet but he’ll be shy at first 🗿 please follow @alanbsantamaria
jesus christ he was such an alan at the party.
by aloonamoon October 16, 2019
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Person B : blocks Person A
Person A : I see he did the commit alan
Person B : blocks Person A
Person A : I see he did the commit alan
by Sushi~ October 24, 2019
Get the commit alan mug.Alan: Hello 🤓Did you know newton measured the circumference of da vinci's ass to derive the equation to perfectly fuck him.
by bruni9597 June 22, 2025
Get the Alan mug.by Ihavetoomanyphases July 4, 2025
Get the Alan frog mug.Person 1: Wow how short is that one story building
Person 2: It must be only 20 or so Alan Chalmers's tall
Person 2: It must be only 20 or so Alan Chalmers's tall
by An Smarrt pearsun August 28, 2025
Get the Alan Chalmers mug.A tag team of fat mexican dudes that touch you and cause chaos and annoyance. The Pedro will talk gangsta and usually ask if you got Zelle to give him money. The Alan of the group will constantly touch and annoy you.
person 1: this one guy asked me "u got Zelle twin??" and another shook a sprite bottle and opened it up in my face
person 2: sounds like Alan & Pedro to me
person 2: sounds like Alan & Pedro to me
by Braden Fortson September 9, 2025
Get the Alan & Pedro mug.Alan (noun):
1. The rare breed of husband who is equal parts best friend, partner in crime, personal hero, and expert eye-roller. Known for tolerating ridiculous amounts of nonsense, fetching cups of tea without complaint (mostly), and having the patience of a saint. Warning: once you get an Alan, you’ll never want to trade him in.
2. A mysterious creature who can simultaneously be your soulmate and the reason you want to scream into a pillow. Special skills include selective hearing, telling dad jokes at the worst possible moment, and doing that “husband sigh” for dramatic effect. Still, you wouldn’t swap him… unless Jason Momoa was available.
3. The ultimate plot twist in life’s story — part best friend, part lover, part comedy act. Always there to hold your hand when things get tough, and usually the reason you’ve got butterflies in your stomach 20+ years later. May also come with a side of snoring and duvet-hogging. Also doubles up as the best dad your kid could ever hope for.
WARNING LABEL: May cause uncontrollable laughter, random butterflies in your stomach, epic dad moments, unexpected dog-cuddle theft, and the occasional need to evacuate a room.
1. The rare breed of husband who is equal parts best friend, partner in crime, personal hero, and expert eye-roller. Known for tolerating ridiculous amounts of nonsense, fetching cups of tea without complaint (mostly), and having the patience of a saint. Warning: once you get an Alan, you’ll never want to trade him in.
2. A mysterious creature who can simultaneously be your soulmate and the reason you want to scream into a pillow. Special skills include selective hearing, telling dad jokes at the worst possible moment, and doing that “husband sigh” for dramatic effect. Still, you wouldn’t swap him… unless Jason Momoa was available.
3. The ultimate plot twist in life’s story — part best friend, part lover, part comedy act. Always there to hold your hand when things get tough, and usually the reason you’ve got butterflies in your stomach 20+ years later. May also come with a side of snoring and duvet-hogging. Also doubles up as the best dad your kid could ever hope for.
WARNING LABEL: May cause uncontrollable laughter, random butterflies in your stomach, epic dad moments, unexpected dog-cuddle theft, and the occasional need to evacuate a room.
• “Stop being dramatic and get yourself an Alan — mine just carried all the shopping, fixed the WiFi, and still had time to laugh at my worst joke.”
• “ Ugh, my Alan just stole cuddles from the dog and then let out a fart so powerful it cleared the living room — but he still had me laughing.”
• “Everyone needs an Alan — he’s the reason I believe in happily ever after (even when he snores loud enough to wake the neighbours).”
• “ Ugh, my Alan just stole cuddles from the dog and then let out a fart so powerful it cleared the living room — but he still had me laughing.”
• “Everyone needs an Alan — he’s the reason I believe in happily ever after (even when he snores loud enough to wake the neighbours).”
by Bionic Scout September 11, 2025
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