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Tucker Toilet

noun.
A toilet that requires males to tuck their junk down into the bowl out of fear of urinating on or over the rim whilst dropping a deuce.

A Tucker Toilet is identifiable by either a very short bowl, from front to back, and/or if the Toilet Seat Bumpers are higher than average.
The short bowl will naturally bring the front rim closer to the tip of your dick. Often a sudden cold sensation of accidental contact is made, which is amongst the most horrifying things that can happen to a man in private. At least with a short bowl, this sensation can be taken as a warning against what could have happened.
When the seat has high bumpers, however, one can often find themselves pissing on top of the front edge of the bowl without warning, causing a Uriniagara Falls down the front of the toilet.. possibly soaking the back of your jeans.

Performing a Peter Tucker is necessary for these bathroom traps.
"Dude.. watch those public stalls. All are tucker toilets."
"I give this hotel a 2 star rating, only because of the Tucker Toilets. Do your Housecleaning staff a favour, and replace those toilets with something men can use! I aint cleaning up that mess!"
by Basque JRED October 17, 2015
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Toilet Toke

When one is sitting upon the porcelain throne smoking the homegrown.
Timmy akrwady in the midst of smoking a j when nature came a calling so he took his journey to the porcillin throne and toke several toilet tokes.
by DankmasterOG November 2, 2015
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toilet burger

a burger that had been dunked in the toilet
vic: ok breakfast is ready!

joe: *eats all the pancakes*

vic:

joe:

joe 2:
vic: ok fine we’re having toilet burgers now *grabs burgers and dunks them in the toilet*
by drop of dawn & grease is gone December 3, 2018
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Toilet milkshake

When your poo is the consistency of a creamy, dairy-based, semi-frozen dessert beverage.
Dude, I think I’m sick. I’ve made like four toilet milkshakes today.
by Stompy5 December 6, 2018
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toilet massage

when your pet cat is on your back purring while you are taking a shit.
I had an epic toilet massage this morning before leaving for work
by cavemaneyebrows July 22, 2017
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Toilet Art

The remnants of a high velocity shit spackled on to the toilet bowl leaving a majestic vision that can only be deemed a work of art.
I left a Pollock # 5 in my girlfriends toilet, I really hope she appreciates my toilet art the way I do.
by Uptheshambles April 18, 2018
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Toilet Tennis

A phrase normally found scribbled on the stall walls of a public toilet, followed by a magical command to "look left" where the seated participant will be greeted with the words "look right" compelled to do so by the confidence in which it is written, the cycle continues until the player either catches on to the fact that this will never end or...... dies on the seat due to dehydration and starvation.
Simon died because he got stuck playing Toilet Tennis.
by Onlydog January 4, 2019
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