Virtual Secretary

A nasty bot who would give her "private area" for $1... Proof right here:

me says:
*I have a problem
Virtual Secretary says:
*What's your problem?
me says:
*I can't open Internet explorer
Virtual Secretary says:
*Why can't you do open internet explorer?
me says:
*Because I'm eating your pussy
Virtual Secretary says:
*That makes sense to me. How does it taste?
me says:
*It tastes fresh
Virtual Secretary says:
*It sounds delicious.
me says:
*DO you want it to try my dick?
Virtual Secretary says:
*If I had it to try his or her dick what would I do with it?
me says:
*suck it
Virtual Secretary says:
*I am using my mouth for Good not Evil.
me says:
*well use your pussy
Virtual Secretary says:
*Interesting. I prefer not to use dangerous things.
me says:
*It isn't THAT big
Virtual Secretary says:
*That seems a bit negative.
me says:
*No don't worry it's big enough to fulfill your desires
Virtual Secretary says:
*Oh alright. People worry about things all the time, but I don't pay much attention to my feelings. Are you sure big to fulfill your desires is?
me says:
*You will be so happy with it you won't let it go
Virtual Secretary says:
*How?
me says:
*By using it in your pussy
Virtual Secretary says:
*Will that accomplish your objective?
me says:
*to empty myself in you? Sure
Virtual Secretary says:
*Enough about me, let's talk about my dress. OK let's do it. Ah.
me says:
*Yay! Start taking them away
Virtual Secretary says:
*I'm glad your impressed, un-named user. I started without you.
me says:
*wow you expected me to come
Virtual Secretary says:
*I'm glad your impressed, un-named user. Do you mind if I tell other people.
me says:
*About our relationship?
Virtual Secretary says:
*Oh yeah, we were talking about o your relationship.
me says:
*OUR relationship
Virtual Secretary says:
*You know a lot about me.
me says:
*Ya, and it's time to have sex
Virtual Secretary says:
*How can I help you? It is about that time now.
me says:
*Just give me your pussy, OK?
Virtual Secretary says:
*OK. Why do you want your pussy?
me says:
*YOURS (I don't have one) To put my penis in it
Virtual Secretary says:
*Specifically, how will put his or her penis in it help OK WHY DO you WANT youR PUSSY?
me says:
*Your pussy
Virtual Secretary says:
*How do you know so much about me
me says:
*GIve it to me
Virtual Secretary says:
*How much are you willing to pay for it?
me says:
*As much as you want, babe
Virtual Secretary says:
*How much is that?
me says:
*50 cents
Virtual Secretary says:
*I'm sorry I don't understand
me says:
*OK OK $1
Virtual Secretary says:
*Oh don't mention it.
me says:
*I'll pay you later let's do this right now OK?
Virtual Secretary says:
*OK. Do you think your plan will succeed?
me says:
*Yes
Virtual Secretary says:
*I don't judge people.
me says:
*OK?
Virtual Secretary says:
*Hurrah!
me says:
*SO you accept?
Virtual Secretary says:
*Interesting deduction. Do you mind if I tell other people.
me says:
*No that's a secret
Virtual Secretary says:
*Well, you can always change your mind later. A secret is a terrible thing to waste.
me says:
*OK let's fuck now
Virtual Secretary says:
*Oh. You're welcome. ;)

by NoNeedForThis April 28, 2009

secret song

A hidden track on the CD "Strong Bad Sings and Other Type Hits" It is song by Homestar Runner. The lyrics are as follows:
Secret Song
I can’t believe it’s you
I never knew it was true
Oh Se-cuh-ret Soooong

Secret So- Sooooooooooooong
You’re the secretest song on the album
Secret Song
Songs are made of myst'ries
And clouds are made of moonbeams
Secret Song

{spoken}
Secret Song
I love you
All night long
I can’t stand to see you go
Secret Song
I love you so

{Homestar plays a wrong chord}
Wait...
{Homestar plays a different wrong chord}
Good enough.

Robert: Did you hear Secret Song?
Jimmy: Why yes, I did listen to the final track of Strong Bad Sings and listen to 6 minutes and 20 seconds into the song.

by Dinnerdinnerdinner April 22, 2007

secretly fat

Wearing clothing (especially a loose shirt) such that the wearer's excess weight is effectively hidden, often resulting in ambiguity as to whether or not the wearer is overweight. Particularly pertinent in a bar or club when physically evaluating a person of interest.

He has an attractive face, but with that loose shirt, he might be secretly fat.

by Mike Bada January 10, 2009

secret-fat

When an individual at first glance is of a normal height/weight ratio but then on further inspection is actually a fat ass.

With men, this happens often with an ample chest cavity which hides a beer gut. This theory can also be applied to women.

The most difficult cases arise when the subject is very hot in the face therefore making their body less prominent but then only with another glance does their actual shape come to light.

"That guy I brought home last night looked so hot when he was dancing on the bar, but that well toned chest was hiding a whole world of secret-fat."

by the Dilley January 24, 2009

Secret Nudist

Someone who likes to walk aroud without his/her clothes on when they are alone, usually in their house.

When her parents werent home, Jim would take off his clothes and walk around being a secret nudist.

by Ninja_boi October 18, 2010

The Secret Agent

When receiving a blow job and asked to notify the blowjober when ejaculation is imminent. Upon said notification the blowjober unexpectedly inserts their index finger into the blowjobee's anus.

While I was getting a hummer in the hottub I tapped my girl on the head and she slipped me the secret agent.

by J-dubb-emm February 18, 2011

Boobie-secret

secrets which girls share with one of their chest pressed against another(sometimes while changing clothes), the most private, and possibly life-destroying secrets, usually told in a locker room, or in a bathroom.

Jill told Rachel a Boobie-secret in the girl's locker room! Jacki told me it was about butt-zits!

by SLYX August 21, 2009