masteroction

A word that was already in my phone's predictive text when I tried to drunkly text masturbation to someone.

"The inter-web has a new feature apparently, there's this thing call 'The Pornograph;' and it aids in masteroction"

by DemonDes March 24, 2008

masturbation in retaliation

Self service, in response to a break up, or a girlfriend who won't give you any. A man's way of saying "I don't need sex either bitch!" A man's best war cry.

JOHNNY: Man my girl is mad, she ain't putting out...
Mike: MASTURBATION IN RETALIATION!
Johnny: REVOLUTION

by JohnnyYou love him to like him July 2, 2016

maskerbation

Oxygen deprivation resulting from mask wearing while masturbating.

Jim passed out while in a mad fit of maskerbation.

by Shempleton February 4, 2021

Masturbation

When one squeezes their balls to pump out cum

"my balls hurt from too much Masturbation

by poochoonut March 12, 2023

corporate masturbation

the act of discussing business without actually saying ANYTHING, but embuing said corporate masturbator with an undeserved feeling of being of interest or utility to those present or his or her current employer

corporate masturbation can easilly be identified when any of the phrases below (but not limited to this list) are used in the context of discussing a business or business activities:

'going forward'
'restructure our asset-base'
'efficient through-flow model '
'KPI monitoring'
'increase the number of revenue streams'
'consolodating our holdings'
'business paradigm shift'
'stakeholders'
'daynamasism'
'strategic re-evaluation'

etc etc

by bored by business bullshit February 26, 2013

Preventative Masturbation

The act of a married, or romantically committed, Man pleasuring himself regularly so as to eliminate the temptation of being unfaithful.

If I didn't do some Preventative Masturbation, I would be chasing after every skank in the neighborhood.

by Niems04 January 9, 2014

Textual Masturbation

When a person writes or types words, phrases, sentences, articles, and the like for the sole purpose of self adulation. While similar to sexting, texual masturbation is primarily for the gratification of the person writing said text, as oppose to the one receiving or reading the text.

Can you believe he wrote an autobiography, that shit is pure Textual Masturbation ?!

by Lain of the Wired December 24, 2014