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The absolute most catastrophic event in the Earth's history, should it happen.

The BBC will send out an emergency broadcast alert, all motorways in the UK will be shut apart from emergency services and military personnel. Southampton will be relegated to the Championship, Pareth Pouthgate will sign a new contract with England, Tesco will stop its £3.50 meal deal, Alex Turner will no longer want to be part of The Strokes, an asteroid will be on a crash collision course with Earth and nothing can be done about it, Pisstiano Penaldo and Parry Pane will both score hattricks against Southampton, Portsmouth will win the Caribou cup again, Bluestar Bus will stop its £1 fares after 6PM, Domino's will no longer do Two for Tuesday, Pizza Hut will stop its £5 favourites, Papa Johns will stop its £8.99 large pizza collection deal, Virgin Media will go out of business, the sale of Elf Bar vapes will be banned in the UK, the servers for Call of Duty World at War will shut down, labour will lose the next general election. These aren't all the events that will happen and just the ones I have on the top of my head...
Spack No.2:MUUUUUUUUM! JACK'S SPANKING AGAIN!

Rishi Sunak or who ever the fuck is PM at the time: "You must ration all essential supplies now and limit outside contact"
by Jack Spank9049 July 30, 2022
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jack vincent

a dickhead who cant bowl legspin for shit or even bat. his ranga hair is easily the warning sign for the shithead you are about to meet. clearly is attracted to Elise
by notdas November 17, 2019
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Spoon-jacked

The act of stealing, or "jacking", multiple spoons from the Wendy's located inside Jester West at The University of Texas.
"Dude we just spoon-jacked the fuck out of them. I won't need spoons for a month!"
by Rug Maker January 26, 2010
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jack dowd

a little boy with no social skills and was born from jesus, he has a setanic heart and loves his chair being kicked
by Flpppp November 3, 2016
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Jack

A slang word used as a replacement of a name to end a statement. Similar to homie, dude, bro, church. Commonly used by pimps.
Love don't live here, Jack.
That's the way of the game, Jack.
by SwallowingJeffrey December 13, 2021
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jack adair

Amelia Jack Adair is such a dumbass
Ava I know, right
by DatBoi429weed April 20, 2018
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Pasta Jack

A very very short human, who is extremely bad at video games and loves daisy
‘Is that pasta jack? Oh he’s the one who’s bad at video games!’
by Masterofdeciet October 15, 2020
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