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Alaskan Paint Job

Noun - when an Alaskan stripper gives you a lap dance & leaves a streak down your pant leg.

Can also be used with any state or town!
Man, I got this killer lap dance last night at the titty bar. The bitch gave me one helluva Alaskan Paint Job!
by Rusty Sheriff's Badge May 28, 2011
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Alaskan bar bq

The state of unlikely success, possibility, comprehension or understanding. As an extreme rarity.
Lighting a cigarette with a wet match is like an "Alaskan Bar bq".

Fitting in a size 10 shoe with your size 12s, is an Alaskan Bar BQ
He's trying to buy a car with no money or no job. That's an Alaskan Bar BQ
by Skeeter Bug July 22, 2018
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Alaskan Butt Piss

When you've been holding your shit for so long, you get explosive diarrhea. Which in turn makes your taint or balls cold as fuck from sitting so long

Alaskan Butt Piss can also be used to describe the amount of toilet paper used which in turn looks like a piss soaked igloo
Alaskan Butt Piss fucking sucks dude, i spent two hours on the gotdamn toilet and i swear my nuts turned into raisins
by specialagent0s0 May 22, 2021
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alaskan spear dive

Alaskan Spear Dive: when a women lays spread eagle on the bed, and her man dives from on top of a surface (i.e table, dresser, cabinet) into the women.
"Man i Alaskan spear dove my girlfriend last night, she couldn't walk after"

"Alaskan Spear Dive bro"
by FuckMaster May 2, 2014
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Alaskan Fishing Well

While having Anal sex with your significant other leave His/Her arse gapping and ejaculate inside. Leaving all of your would-be children swimming inside.
Joel: So, how sex with Jennifer?
Mike: It was great! I gave her an Alaskan Fishing Well!
Joel: Damn son, you wild...
by _Chunky_But_Funky_ January 15, 2017
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Alaskan Cod Grinder

A common sexual act in the remote north:

Step 1: Once the sun has reached high in the sky, awake from your slumber and journey to your local fish market. Identify the least hygienic vendor and purchase 1 lb. of the most rancid cod (preferably chum) available.

Step 2: Return home and grind fish into a fine paste; do not descale or remove bones.

Step 3: Fill condom with sea stank paste and, before allowing to freeze over night, squish drill bit into open end.

Step 4: Remove condom from frozen fish dick and mount on your most powerful handheld drill.

Step 5: Tape down the trigger and enjoy the Alaska Cod Grinder as you rearrange the guts of your sexual partner. Anal play recommended.
Tyler drilled me a new hole last night with an Alaskan Cod Grinder. I’ve never cum harder.
by SirHoneyVadger December 7, 2019
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Alaskan head lock

When a naked female sits on the shoulders of a naked male and chokes him with her thighs as he jerks off, eventually causing him to pass out as he cums.
My buddy Ted almost died when his wife gave him the old Alaskan head lock the other night.
by DJslut123 June 22, 2023
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