Skip to main content

Playing touch P-P

1. People being unaware of their surroundings, and having no sense of urgency whatever. In effect, not respecting others by moving the hell out of the way so that people who DO have something important to do can proceed with their lives.

2. When committing a crime, those people around you who have their backs turned, or are preoccupied with something else, allowing you to get on with the business at hand.
Ex: “If this asshole would quit playing touch p-p with that cashier I could get the fuck outa here.”
2nd ex: “While that woman was playing touch p-p with her airbags, I drove around her and dipped off the exit ramp.
by Jack of trade January 1, 2022
mugGet the Playing touch P-P mug.

Yogurt Touch

Fixing something by accident when you’re drunk as fuck at work.
It’s fixed because I have the yogurt touch.

I’ve got the yogurt touch!
You know, the yogurt touch?
by Drinkydadjimbo February 1, 2023
mugGet the Yogurt Touch mug.

The Feces Touch

When everything you touch turns to shit. The opposite of The Midas Touch.
Agreed. He has the Feces Touch.
by Pistol Pete Maravich February 20, 2011
mugGet the The Feces Touch mug.

Golden Touch

A person who is very lucky and can fix most problems by mearly touching or slightly tweaking the object, for example, a master IT programmer who removes a trojan in only a few keystrokes would be claimed to have the golden touch.
"I can't believe you fixed that without hardly doing anything, you must have a hell of a Golden Touch!"
by Dazzamon April 20, 2006
mugGet the Golden Touch mug.

Inappropriate touch tuesday

Inappropriate touch Tuesday is a term coined my comedian Daniel Tosh. It is a made up holiday that requires participants to go and inappropriately touch others. The others are most likely non-participants in this holiday. It should be noted that two people of the same sex inappropriately touching each other is not to be considered gay unless the two are unaware or non participants or the touch is extremely gay.
Chris walks by and brushes up against Carolin's butt
Carolin: WTF you pedo
Chris: but it's inappropriate touch tuesday!
Carolin: Oh, I cant believe I forgot!
by Brew Kellen May 17, 2011
mugGet the Inappropriate touch tuesday mug.

Don't touch my junk

A stern warning to TSA gropers to not touch John Tyner's penis or balls when told he was about to undergo a "groin check".
Don't touch my junk. If you touch my junk, I'm going to have you arrested. -- John Tyner, San Diego Airport, November 13, 2010
by RealTailDragger November 22, 2010
mugGet the Don't touch my junk mug.

Because you touch yourself at night

The truly ultimate responce to any kind of stupid or annoying "why" question, or simply to a question you cannot answer.
That answer will totally piss off annoying kids who ask too many questions.
See also: because you're gay.
Kid: Why did the dinosaurs die out?
Tour guide: Because you touch yourself at night.

Son: Why do you drink so much, dad?
Dad: Because you touch yourself at night!

Little brother: Why don't you ever let me into your room?
Big brother: Because you touch yourself at night, you little brat!
by Urban_Fellow June 24, 2006
mugGet the Because you touch yourself at night mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email