SPANKING THE TURTLE

The act of trying to slap a turtle head back up your luscious cheeks to avoid sheer embarrassment and the otter humiliation that comes with shitting your pants. This commonly done when restrooms are not available.
“Bro, I was SPANKING THE TURTLE 🐢 in hopes I would make it to a bathroom in time.”
by Steven dickerson June 17, 2018
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bert the turtle

A turtle used in the '50s to promote "Duck and Cover" in the case of an atomic bomb exploded. You can watch the video on you tube.
Tert The Burtle said, "Cuck and Dover" --- er, i mean, Bert the Turtle... same differemce
by Mr. Stinkypride February 03, 2017
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Turtle man

The creepy neighbor who you think likes his turtles to ducking much and throws birthday parties for them in his backyard which gets very uncomfortable when he asks the children to come over and celebrate it with him.
Mother:it's time to go inside
Kids:why?
Mother whispers:turtle man is out now hurry!
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Velvet turtle

A fine dining chain of restaurants headquartered in san mateo ca with locations in california arizona and washington state. The chain reached its zenith of popularity in the early '80s and was defunct by the early '90s when the publics taste started trending more towards casual dining.
My son just graduated from the 6th grade. He wanted to go to chuckyi cheese to celebrate buy
I insisted on the velvet turtle instead!
by 4realazitgits March 24, 2021
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turtle popping

When you are running to the toilet with poo half out of your bum and you're squeezing your anus to get it back in.

Like a turtles head half out of its shell.
"Oh my God, I got to go to the loo; I'm turtle popping!"
by Carnthepear August 08, 2015
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Yertle the Turtle

The sexiest character in all of Dr Suess’ books. Anyone who plays the part of the sexy turtle himself is bound to have sex almost everyday. If you have the honor of sleeping with Yertle you instantly become the sexiest person in a 17.23 mile radius.
Wow the girl is the sexiest person in a 17.23 mile radius she must of fucked yertle the turtle
by Hurburt December 02, 2019
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tempting the turtle

the act of subtly exciting oneself, by discreetly flicking the end ones knob, often in public.
1.Ethan. "dude it looks like that guy is playing with himself under the table".
Chris. "yea hes totally tempting the turtle".

2.Mitch. "oh my god I'm so board, i totally feel like tempting the turtle.
by spongecarrotsaysmoo December 06, 2009
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