You are suffering from "Curse of Craig" when Microsoft Teams decides to play hide and seek with your online status, acting all mysterious and crashing like it's auditioning for a sci-fi thriller. Additionally, when the crash hits, it's like Teams just dropped the mic and left the building.
It's like Craig, the mischievous Teams gremlin, decided to mess with your vibes. Your status? Offline. Your sanity? Hanging by a thread. It's the Teams version of a glitchy rollercoaster, throwing unexpected loops and turns when you least expect it. You're sending messages into the void, hoping against hope that your coworkers don't think you've ghosted the whole squad.
So, next time Teams decides to play hide-and-seek with your online presence, just know you've fallen victim to the Curse of Craig.
It's like Craig, the mischievous Teams gremlin, decided to mess with your vibes. Your status? Offline. Your sanity? Hanging by a thread. It's the Teams version of a glitchy rollercoaster, throwing unexpected loops and turns when you least expect it. You're sending messages into the void, hoping against hope that your coworkers don't think you've ghosted the whole squad.
So, next time Teams decides to play hide-and-seek with your online presence, just know you've fallen victim to the Curse of Craig.
As I was gearing up for the most crucial virtual meeting of the week, the Curse of Craig hit me like a rogue wave.
by GarroshIcecream January 17, 2024
You’re a girl, and you’re dating a boy. You cheat on him, you push him out of bed, you slap him in the face, etc. and in return, you notice he starts acting different that night. He pronounces his R’s like W’s, he colors on an app you’ve never seen him play, his voice is as high pitched as he can arrange it to be, and he uses quotes from his ex and his intended in-laws in conversation when it doesn’t even make sense. He copes, in absurdity and idiosyncratic amusement, by doing his best impression of his first girlfriend, the one he calls “The Sword”. You fall asleep thereafter.
Then, like a phantom, he escapes in the night, and listens to the old songs, and drives in the old way, down the kingsroad, and you never see him again. For only the one that came before you, all of you, offered him up the peace, and the comfort, and the love, to truly rest. You asked about her, once and never again, after noticing his enthusiasm and nostalgia, as if it were 50 years ago. And your decision to betray him brought upon your worst enemy. And this confusion you experienced and verbalized is what it means to have the curse of the blade.
Then, like a phantom, he escapes in the night, and listens to the old songs, and drives in the old way, down the kingsroad, and you never see him again. For only the one that came before you, all of you, offered him up the peace, and the comfort, and the love, to truly rest. You asked about her, once and never again, after noticing his enthusiasm and nostalgia, as if it were 50 years ago. And your decision to betray him brought upon your worst enemy. And this confusion you experienced and verbalized is what it means to have the curse of the blade.
Usurper: “Vance you are so fucking dumb it’s not even funny”
Sticky Vicky: “You’re not dumb, you’re perfect”
Usurper: “uhh I wasn’t talking about myself you fucking idiot.”
Sticky Vicky: “okay get into it I guess”
Usurper: “UHH YEAH WE WILL FUCKING GET INTO IT, YOU ARE PISSING ME THE FUCK OFF
Sticky Vicky: “But I was just twying to hewlp…
Usurper: “Whatever…I’m going to bed” (CURSE OF THE BLADE).
*Sticky Vicky Von Vanimal leaves the usurper, and she is blocked, baleeted, and BTFO’d before his car even starts. And when he yearns for her, it is “Drugs” by lil Aaron, or Tate McRae, or cupcakke. And when he yearns for his younger self, it is Slayer, or Priest, or Pink Tape by lil uzi vert. And when it’s both, it is “Drunk in Love” by Beyoncé, or “Baby I need Your Loving’” by Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell, and several songs he has heard at his nursing home job for the last 5 years. Either way, it is on full volume. a concert, really, taking him home. And it is always, always, his favorite moment, in any of the relationships that have come after the one he calls “the sword.” Finally, the pretending is over with, and full attention and respect is paid to the way things once were, without turmoil, or guilt, or the dreading of a future with someone he doesn’t love.*
Sticky Vicky: “You’re not dumb, you’re perfect”
Usurper: “uhh I wasn’t talking about myself you fucking idiot.”
Sticky Vicky: “okay get into it I guess”
Usurper: “UHH YEAH WE WILL FUCKING GET INTO IT, YOU ARE PISSING ME THE FUCK OFF
Sticky Vicky: “But I was just twying to hewlp…
Usurper: “Whatever…I’m going to bed” (CURSE OF THE BLADE).
*Sticky Vicky Von Vanimal leaves the usurper, and she is blocked, baleeted, and BTFO’d before his car even starts. And when he yearns for her, it is “Drugs” by lil Aaron, or Tate McRae, or cupcakke. And when he yearns for his younger self, it is Slayer, or Priest, or Pink Tape by lil uzi vert. And when it’s both, it is “Drunk in Love” by Beyoncé, or “Baby I need Your Loving’” by Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell, and several songs he has heard at his nursing home job for the last 5 years. Either way, it is on full volume. a concert, really, taking him home. And it is always, always, his favorite moment, in any of the relationships that have come after the one he calls “the sword.” Finally, the pretending is over with, and full attention and respect is paid to the way things once were, without turmoil, or guilt, or the dreading of a future with someone he doesn’t love.*
by Captain Cream Soda May 27, 2025
When you wear yellow and it consumes your personality; usually applied for people who tend to have a certain distaste for yellow.
by caiusmirk May 26, 2025
The dark cloud of doom that plagues one’s favorite sports team for years and decades that can only be undone by a fan, bandwagon fan, or faithful fan by a sports sacrifice to that particular teams sports god for a championship.
“Dude, you’re not fooling anyone, we all know you’re gay, so admit it already as sacrifice so the 49ers can win a Super Bowl finally!, because The WillyGoat Curse is taking out our 49ers best players every game!”
by The Bonk December 03, 2024
by Ser Przeklęty w dziurę klnięty June 05, 2020
A curse by the frog that makes the person(s) cursed turn into a frog exactly 54 .75 seconds after physical romantic satisfaction for roughly half an hour I'd say.
Jim: ah man I got the curse of the frog
Norbert: what's the curse of the frog?
Jim: the curse of the frog is a curse by the frog that makes the person(s) cursed by the frog turn into a frog exactly 54.75 seconds after physical romantic satisfaction for roughly half an hour I'd say.
Norbert: nortbert.
Bender (from hit tv show Futurama): woah mama!
Norbert: what's the curse of the frog?
Jim: the curse of the frog is a curse by the frog that makes the person(s) cursed by the frog turn into a frog exactly 54.75 seconds after physical romantic satisfaction for roughly half an hour I'd say.
Norbert: nortbert.
Bender (from hit tv show Futurama): woah mama!
by Billybobthefourth June 17, 2024
by Aluminose1 February 10, 2020