I wish I was Jared, 19

This phrase can be seen in the comment section of outrageous or otherwise shocking posts to express disturbance, confusion, or surprise. It refers to the popular vine “My name is Jared, I’m 19, and I never learned how to fucking read”

*A tweet vividly describing someones sexual fantasy involving feet, motor oil, 13 male strippers, toothpaste, used toilet paper, and a bidet*

Comment section:
“Man, I wish I was Jared, 19”

by Seen_too_much June 7, 2024

Jared

A drunken simp with a tiny dick who doesnt take no for an answer. he gets no bitches, but he has nice hair. the kinda dude who will send you some lil peep at 3 am cuz hes simping over the fact that you dont want him

ohoh Jared is fucked up and about to ruin everyone's night again

by anonymous April 3, 2022

Jared

An intelligent fellow. He is very determined when it comes to accomplishing things. He is very attractive, but his personality and his taste in music are his best qualities. He is very genuine and understanding of others opinions. He is sure of whatever he says. Most importantly, he’s very capable of reaching his goals.

Jared presented to the class his project like an intellectual individual.

by Jasmineongod June 7, 2020

Jared

Jared is a 19 year who never learned how to flipping read.

"JARED can you read the sentence"

"No I can not"
"Hey whats up, my names jared and I never learned how to fucking read"

by dEfInItIoNs SuCk February 16, 2019

Jared

A raging homosexual who hates fun

Person 1: man this "Jared" guy is such a rat he hates fun and just makes gay jokes

by GFreem February 9, 2023

Jared

A guy who has a small knob and is a bell end and is the shittiest gamer ever.

D: OMG don’t be such a Jared

R: You saying I suck at this?

by 420DankShit December 1, 2018

Jared

Im in your bed but hes in your twitch chat

Jared is like 2.0 chad

by Go.touch.GRASS May 21, 2021