Tool

One who thinks highly of themselves, and possibly the close circle of "friends" they surround themselves with. Also typically used for something such as; a car, money, sex, alcohol, drugs,etc; yet are completely unaware of their tool-like qualities. Find it attractive to wear extremely tight t-shirt whether actual muscular definition is in fact there or not. Find it needed to add unnecessary words and syllables to their flamboyant vocabulary, such as "Dude, dude, dude! check.it.out." On occasion are known to have completely ridiculous tattoos of utterly stupid objects or symbols, that little to no meaning to them or anyone else, in any way shape or form.

Tools:
Nima Zigahmi
Ashkon Firefighter wanna-be with a gay tattoo
We'll get back to you on more. But for now. Be afraid, be very afraid.

by Calls em as I sees em November 14, 2010

Tool

Someone who screws nuts then bolts.

That tool fucks chicks then takes off right after.

by NickKentucky December 1, 2010

Tooliosis

A medical condition in which the victim has all the mental and physical attributes of a tool.

Bhavin Patel became patient zero of tooliosis because he didn't believe in bros before hoes.

by taikopleshanda March 9, 2011

toolerman

Somebody who always seems to get the best seat in the house.

The toolerman always gets the best seat in the house

by TakerT June 9, 2011

tool duel

(n) When two obnoxious and tool-esque guys battle it out in reference to drinking, trash-talking, hooking up with girls, or other frat-like activities, in order to secure their title as alpha-tool.

1. "Did you see Nathan do that keg stand for 45 seconds?"
2. "Yea, but Kev-O did one for 47 seconds while that hot blonde was watching."
1. Looks like Kev-O won the tool duel.

by wheresbuckbeack? July 19, 2011

toolbaginism

The act of being a complete retard as if you went to college and studied toolbagery. The guy in every bar who is "that guy" who thinks he can top evey story known to man. Most of the time, subjects are money grubbing trustfund babies. the art of being the ultimate toolbag. having the trifecta in cockblocking, stumbeling, and inapropriate mouth.

"That douche has a degree in toolbaginism."

friend 1: damn dude, that girl over there is a dime piece.
friend 2: Yea bro you ain't kidding.
toolbag (LOUDLY) : yea man i would suck a fart out of her ass and hold it like a bong hit.......watch me work.

by snarfshark77 August 4, 2011

tool

A nice person who gets used by scumbags, cause thats just the way the world is.

Bob: Hey, Jim. Can I get a ride home.
Jim: Go F*ck yourself a**hole.
Bob: Excuse me.
Jim: Yeah I would've been nice but you're one of those deutch* bags that calls nice people tools....ya fa*got a** b*tch.
Bob: But....
Jim: Go F*ck yourself, cuz if you dont I'm gonna f*ckin rape you with a Jason Vorhees mask on while you cry like a little B*tch
Bob: Im gonna go hang myself
Jim: Good, I'm gonna rape your mother and then take a sh*t on your grave and stick your mother chopped off head in it.

by pseudonym135 October 13, 2011