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Paddles

A place in the dark depths of Pembroke, Pembrokeshire where you can catch crabs and gonorrhea from just breathing. A nightclub in which you have to be 18 to enter, however paddling 14 year olds are subsequently let in for 'looking' 18 because the bouncers are ill-educated twats who need their glasses fixed. Once inside a rare sight will be seen, the inhabitants of Pembroke and Pembroke Dock (sometimes even Haverfordwest) all 'getting low' to Flo Rida in one big clan. It is the one place where married 40 year olds can go and pull a naive 14 year old and be no consequences.
girl1: I'm 14, and i go to paddles!
girl2: Me to, cause i'm from Monkton!
girl3: Same, i got there to get totally taken advantage of by some 40 year old man while i'm drunk after my 2 WKD's!

guy1: you paddling it this weekend?
guy2: no, i actually like the way my healthy dick looks!
by flooooo May 25, 2009
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Paddle Faster I hear Banjoes!

A term used between 2 individuals when travelling through an area which you wouldn't normally traverse because it is frequented by a bunch of horrible individuals who would not think twice about shagging you up the arse!

Taken from the disturbing film Deliverance, where Burt Reynolds and friends get chased by a bunch of hillbillies in the woods, who want to shag Ned Beatty up the poop-shoot!
Godfrey: I think we should get on the next bus Gerald, I don't like it round here?

Gerald: I agree darling, we better paddle faster I hear Banjoes!
by Johnny 2 Sheds June 5, 2009
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drunk to puddles

When one reaches a state of intoxication that likens them to a puddle.

Characterized by the following:
- An internal state of gushiness
- Being sprawled out or in a fetal position on the floor
- Having literally passed out in a puddle outside when trying to make it home.
Yo, did you see Alan last night? He was wicked drunk!

Yeah, that kid was drunk to puddles. I heard he hit on like six girls and then passed out at the bottom of the stairwell of his ex's apartment.
by Alan & Aileen December 15, 2008
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Puddlewasher

A classy lady caught in the act of washing her vagina in a mud puddle between clients while hooking. Often the "puddlewasher" is homeless, strung-out and wearing a skirt.
Brandon - Dude! Did you just see that?!
Dennis - See what?
Brandon - I think that hooker was just washing her vag in a mud puddle!
Dennis - A puddlewasher?

Brandon - That's fucked up. Let's get some lunch. I'm starving.
by Bbrttown February 4, 2010
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paddle bitch

CV: aly is my paddle bitch
JS: youre soo lucky man
by pbzbusiness December 3, 2010
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fat paddles

an observed condition when fat people turn hands sideways when walking in a vain attempt to gain more momentum using hands like paddles
by madferret September 19, 2010
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piddle farm

restroom; bathroom; place where piddle is harvested
Tim must have had a burrito for lunch because he was i heard him in pain in the PIDDLE FARM.

Julie has to pee so bad I saw her run to the PIDDLE FARM.

Frank drank so much last night i think he is peeing and throwing up at once in the PIDDLE FARM.
by Frankie B June 28, 2006
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