Weird as a monkey's beard

When something is just too weird, and the only way to describe it is that of a beard attached to a monkeys face.

Can you believe Shangela eats sofa cushions on the reg? That's weird as a monkey's beard!

by Dr. Hand May 22, 2024

Twiddle monkey

The act of wiggling a foreign object up the male pee hole for pleasure. Usually done to one’s self.

She likes to watch him jerk off while she does the Sunday crossword, but gets annoyed when he goes all twiddle monkey with the pencil eraser she’s using.

by The radio dude November 24, 2021

Space Monkey

Slur
Racist term for white people. Derived from the theory that white people are not natural to earth combined with the theory of evolution, as put forth by hidden colors 1-4 metaphsicists.

" shut up you pink Space Monkey "

by Pistol 0G March 9, 2020

monkey nuts

so monkey nuts are the magazines on a choppa. usally in 2 so u call them monkey nuts. they also HANGLO.

"choppa with the monkey nuts i let em hanglo"
- hanglo 1nonly, 870glizzy

by rubyrudegyal October 28, 2025

monkey

you r a rasict

is that a monkey in the tree

by ur public grandma April 3, 2023

Trunk Monkey

A person who is black that can't drive

man I hate those trunk monkeys

by CrAcK_mOnKeY195 December 19, 2022

Workbook Monkey

When implementing Workday, and working with consultants that don't actually know anything to help you optimize your processes, all they can do is tell you how to fill out an Excel workbook.

We need to transform this process, but John is just a workbook monkey, he can't help us.

by Agamemnon999 October 30, 2025