Read Colossians

To go poop. Colossians is the shortest book in the Bible and can be read in 3-5 min—while going #2.

After three burritos and a side order of nachos, I snuck away from the family to go read Colossians.

by JC Mathews October 09, 2022

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by AnudaJaniceRobles June 09, 2025

Kerrigan Reading

A freakin ahmazing person, your best friend, and the person everyone is jealous of. She is absolutely gorgeous in every way. Shes a great secret keeper, and will always be there for you. She looks like she couldnt harm a fly butt she can kick your freaking butt if she needs too. Shes usually a very great dancer and she kicks butt at everything she does. Shes such a great girlfriend and if you didnt give her a chance then youre missing out. She can sometimes be full of herself though. If you dont know a Kerrigan Reading you should because she is the best thing that will ever happen to you. Peace out!

Person: I can't beleive I dumped Kerrigan Reading!!! She was the most amazing person ever.

Person: I so wish I was friends with Kerrigan Reading. She seems so cool!!

by duckshutup August 07, 2010

Reading the Paper

A phrase used to nonchalantly tell someone that you are smoking marijuana. The phrase brings with it a large number of puns that can be quite humerus.

Friend: (Calls you on the phone) Hey man, what are you doing?

You: I'm just sitting around 'reading the paper'!

Friend: Sweet, so I guess you got the 'news'!

You: Totally got the 'news'!

by TheGreatBigD August 27, 2014

Figuring out the fact that the character limit is extremely long on Urban Dictionary so you use whatever you can to the point where it gets hard to read or maybe even off screen

That.

#1: "Y'know, I figured out that figuring out the fact that the character limit is extremely long on Urban Dictionary so you use whatever you can to the point where it gets hard to read or maybe even off screen."

#2: "...What?"

by July 28, 2023

Gossip Read

Used when relating possibly non-factual information you read somewhere.

I gossip read that the Microsoft layoffs are mostly in the marketing department.

by HeyEbeth January 18, 2023

read your pump

To read one's pump is to notice when an individual has recently lifted. Often used as a compliment or praise, acknowledging another individuals swollen muscles.

"Hey bro, your arms are looking juicy af right now. You do arms today?"
"Yeah, I did actually, how'd you notice?"
"Brother, I read your pump"

by Natty Lyfe May 12, 2023