Self Diagnosis Doctors

People who diagnose conditions without actually having a degree. While some people are proficient at this, many are not.

Steve - "Man, my stomach is really cramped up."
Self Diagnosis Doctors - "You probably have aids."

by StevoPativo March 11, 2011

Self-Deficating

The act of shitting ones own pants, most often resulting from an embarrassing situation.

The drama-queen was so drunk last night that she didn't know what she had said and done. When we told her, she ran into a corner and started self-deficating. Sadly, her act of self-deficating only made her more embarrassed, and she self-deficated again. It was a vicious and smelly circle she got herself into.

by BLT85022 November 11, 2011

Yeetus the Fetus Commit Self Deletus

Abort the baby and commit die.
Also could mean that you either abort the baby or kill yourself.

"If you get pregnant, you better Yeetus the Fetus Commit Self Deletus.

by ImmaHeadOut December 3, 2019

self-deprecating humor

Humor where you put yourself down.
Sometimes funny, but sometimes overused fishing for compliments or a signal of low self-esteem.

ex. 1
Yeah, I just walked into the wall outside *smiles, while friend laughs* man I'm clumsy.
ex. 2
Dang, your're all such good students, studying for the test, I'm prolly gonna fail. *says the straight A student*

by andriod5 September 6, 2005

Self Defense

popular method of thwarting muggers. Patented by self defense instructor Brett Kaywood and has proved to be effective in the only laboaratory that matters: The streets. When confronted by a mugger, the method consists of 2 simple steps:

1) Gain wrist control

2) Pull out your gun

This technique can be used in many situations such as:

- You're walking home from work when a mugger confronts you in a back alleyway because he wants crack.

- Your best friend mugs you at his barbacue because he wants your money to buy crack.

- Your mugger is sleeping in their own bed (remember to climb in through the window) and is mugging you for crack.

- Your mugger is bound by the wrists in the trunk of your car and he is mugging you because he needs crack.

Person 1: I heard it was your grandma's 100th birthday today. How did that go?

Person 2: She tried mugging me to buy crack so I used what I learned from Self Defense and pulled out my gun.

by eclipseballer603 December 9, 2008

self-defecating

To shit oneself. From the word "defecate," meaning, "have a bowel movement." And the word, self, meaning "One's identity."

"Yo, did you see that guy? He was totally self-defecating!"

by MoreAwesomeThanThisGuy! March 5, 2010

Mr. Self Destruct

1. A button in most mad scientists' lair that both blows up their crib and causes them to fall to their knees and yell, "NOOOOOOO!" while shaking their fists at the sky in a most hilarious manner.

2. Secondly, and more importantly, A song by Nine Inch Nails that was originally the first song on The Downward Spiral but now has three kickass remixes on Further Down The Spiral.

1. NOOOOOOOOOOO! Why did I even invent that button? Why did I give such a cutesy name and put it in such pain sight?? Damn you Mr. Self Destruct! Boom...

2. boom... boom. boom. (indecipherable whisper)
boom. boom.boom.boom.boomboomboomboomboom
I am the voice inside your head (and i control you). I am the lover in your bed (and i control you). I am the sex that you provide (and i control you). I am the hate you try to hide (and i control you).

by Fitoflaughter December 9, 2008