A common product or process, that is available to anyone, but is passed off by the person using it as if it were secret or uncommon.
The owner of the laundry told the customer that he knew an "Ancient Chinese Secret" for getting his customer's clothes so clean, but his wife knew that he used a common detergent that anyone could buy.
by Orlando_Taz March 29, 2013
My math teacher gave me a 69 on that test so now I'm going to Mexican Secret Santa her house.
I took a laxative and Mexican Secret Santaed his house because he gave me a pink sock
I took a laxative and Mexican Secret Santaed his house because he gave me a pink sock
by navenaveve69 May 25, 2010
by dbs3272globeabb November 04, 2022
Usually known by the acronym SIF, a secret internet fatty posts photographs of themselves on social networking sites that are purposely shot so as to disguise their obesity. Classic examples usually include a combination of:
- close-up head or face shots
- extremely high or overhead camera angles
- low-key lighting and possibly actual image manipulation.
Women often show cleavage, or employ boobnosis, as a secondary deception.
Since most men have booblevision to begin with, they rarely pause to consider that the SIF in question could shrink one to three WHOLE bra cup sizes if they ever lost the excess fat. Obviously going from a D cup to an A cup would render the formerly outstanding bust line moot.
(In this same vein, a woman writer once quipped, "When I'm a size six, I can get into my favorite jeans. When I'm a size fourteen, I finally have the bust line that I always wanted in high school.") 'Nuff said?
Secret internet fatties come in two basic groups: those who want to lose weight, and those who won't do what is necessary to lose weight (choosing instead to refer to themselves by outrageous euphemisms such as: "fluffy", "juicy", "big boned", "pleasingly plump", or "BBW". Star Jones is their poster child).
To the first group, I would suggest having your thyroid gland checked out by a medical doctor who knows something about nutrition and does not dismiss naturopathic remedies. Eat enough medium to low calorie foods to feel full, and have a few colonics to insure proper nutrient absorption. If you have been genetically hosed by your family's DNA, you're going to have to put extra effort into whatever you do. Surgery may be an option, but there is NO substitute for regular exercise.
To the second group I ask, who do you think you are fooling? As Jeff Foxworthy observed about large women wearing Spandex, "If your bottom looks like two raccoons wrestling around in a fifty pound sack of feed, you are NOT 'juicy'!"
- close-up head or face shots
- extremely high or overhead camera angles
- low-key lighting and possibly actual image manipulation.
Women often show cleavage, or employ boobnosis, as a secondary deception.
Since most men have booblevision to begin with, they rarely pause to consider that the SIF in question could shrink one to three WHOLE bra cup sizes if they ever lost the excess fat. Obviously going from a D cup to an A cup would render the formerly outstanding bust line moot.
(In this same vein, a woman writer once quipped, "When I'm a size six, I can get into my favorite jeans. When I'm a size fourteen, I finally have the bust line that I always wanted in high school.") 'Nuff said?
Secret internet fatties come in two basic groups: those who want to lose weight, and those who won't do what is necessary to lose weight (choosing instead to refer to themselves by outrageous euphemisms such as: "fluffy", "juicy", "big boned", "pleasingly plump", or "BBW". Star Jones is their poster child).
To the first group, I would suggest having your thyroid gland checked out by a medical doctor who knows something about nutrition and does not dismiss naturopathic remedies. Eat enough medium to low calorie foods to feel full, and have a few colonics to insure proper nutrient absorption. If you have been genetically hosed by your family's DNA, you're going to have to put extra effort into whatever you do. Surgery may be an option, but there is NO substitute for regular exercise.
To the second group I ask, who do you think you are fooling? As Jeff Foxworthy observed about large women wearing Spandex, "If your bottom looks like two raccoons wrestling around in a fifty pound sack of feed, you are NOT 'juicy'!"
>>>>>
SexyLexie is a self-proclaimed "MySpace hottie" but Kip Dynamite wants a full body shot to prove she's not just another secret internet fatty with delusions of grandeur.
SexyLexie is a self-proclaimed "MySpace hottie" but Kip Dynamite wants a full body shot to prove she's not just another secret internet fatty with delusions of grandeur.
by One Stark Reality September 17, 2009
A phrase to describe when someone is so introverted that even when they are having a really good time you would never know it.
I knew that I’d given him the perfect birthday celebration but as I closely watched his face I could glean absolutely nothing at all because he is the master of having an entirely secret good time.
by Dr Bunnygirl July 03, 2020
The secret cow level is a secret level on Diablo 2 that can be accessed by merging a wirt's leg with a scroll of home portal inyour horadric's cube.
by sharkben February 08, 2009
"Secret Diplomatic Negotiations" is a comical euphemism for anal sex. It was coined over at www.apennyforlenny.com, based on a Jeopardy clue.
The clue was from the category "BACK" TO SCHOOL. It was:
“SECRET DIPLOMATIC NEGOTIATIONS ARE SAID TO GO THROUGH THIS”
The answer was "WHAT IS THE BACKDOOR?"
The clue was from the category "BACK" TO SCHOOL. It was:
“SECRET DIPLOMATIC NEGOTIATIONS ARE SAID TO GO THROUGH THIS”
The answer was "WHAT IS THE BACKDOOR?"
"Could I interest any of you ladies in some Secret Diplomatic Negotiations?"
"Yeah, me and Becky Diplomatically Negotiated in Secret all night long."
"If you're ever in prison, watch out for the Secret Diplomatic Negotiations that happen in the shower."
"Yeah, me and Becky Diplomatically Negotiated in Secret all night long."
"If you're ever in prison, watch out for the Secret Diplomatic Negotiations that happen in the shower."
by An Interested Party August 14, 2009