Caulk the toilet

The act of ejaculating in a woman (or man's) ass.

I'm taking that bitch home tonight, I think I need to Caulk the toilet!

by LaineyB October 19, 2009

take a toilet

to take a crap. to take a poop.

Wooo-Dallas! Do I EVER need to take a toilet! Them pigskins done eat my colon to pieces!

by mangusforeal June 18, 2006

Toilet Jockey

Strictly a Male based role. When using a urinal in a Club or Pub another man feels the need to converse, normally making eye contact, just to make the situation even more awkward.

Guy 1: "How'd it go last night with that girl?"

Guy 2 "Dude! Every time I had a piss there was a toilet jockey talking at me. Completely put me off my stride "

by Ashbk February 3, 2010

toilet gagger

A crap so big that it will not flush.

I went to use the can but there was a toilet gagger in there and could not plant my ass over it.

by Deer Head Joe August 28, 2009

Toilet song

A “toilet song”, is a song with such poorly written lyrics, it sounds like it was made up whilst sitting on the toilet.
It can be applied to a song with lyrics that are either nonsensical, basic or just gibberish.

#1) Remember that Afroman tune from back in the day?

#2) Oh Shit! Yeah! What was it called again?🤔

#1) Because I got High, because I got High.🤑

Both) Because I got HHHIIIIIIII!

😙😝La La, La, La La La 🤣😂

#2 Yeah, that was such a ‘toilet song’!😂

by Tommy Didads March 22, 2019

toilet literature

newspapers, national geographic any magazine is good for toilet literature

A: Man it's part of the ritual u gotta read some shit u don't care about to take a good shit
B: Word...

or

C:I'm writing for the local newspaper....
D: <whispers to his mate> Toilet literature

by Boojah3 July 23, 2011

Toilet Varnish

A case of severe diarrhea which "varnishes" the toilet brown...also called "Toilet Paint".
Toilet Varnish is extremely difficult to clean if it is not flushed within a week.

after all those grapes i needed to go varnish the toilet...

i said to my sister: "I'm not cleaning your Toilet Varnish!"

by FNX September 11, 2005