Burnt Nuts

Jacking off too fast and getting friction burns

Bro, I went too hard last night and got me some burnt nuts

by AWEYEAH May 14, 2017

chinese nuts

Really smelly and small nuts

Did you see that guy? I heard he's got Chinese nuts

by Prometheus42 September 5, 2016

Deez Nuts

Giant eggs eggs
This joke is told by men with a small penis
Pocket light swords

Hey how’s your mom?
Deez Nuts

by HHHHHOWDY Yall June 25, 2022

the ginger nuts

A ginger, (preferabbly with the name jamie L.) will proceed to lift up ones eyelid, sticking the tip between the eyelid and eye and finishing into the back of the eye while fingering their bum.

I dont even need contact lenses anymore, jamie did the ginger nuts on me!

by eddthomp June 13, 2023

Mega super duper uber hyper extra turbo ultra nut XL

A Nut you Can release only when your balls reach max capacity.This nut will cover your entire bed with semen 3 feet high. One has to finish the length of a hundred NNNs to achieve this nut. It will also make you shoot blanks for 5 months afterwards.

Person 1: yo, I just did that Mega super duper uber hyper extra turbo ultra nut XL
Person 2: Legend states no one has ever survived, how did you do it

by What’s your handle321 March 2, 2024

Red Nut Syndrome

Also called acute nuthin pain. When you’ve been bustin sum guud ass nut all over the walls for less than 6 months and suddenly your dick and balls turn redder than the devil’s dick. Other symptoms include pain, swelling, and difficulty finishing a guud Mia Khalifa video or three girls one cup video because your balls hurt so bad.

Horny1: bruh I just snorted viagra and have been locked up in my room all day bustin guud nut when all of a sudden my dick and balls got all red n shit!
Doctor Douche: Well let’s see here! Oh shit yo ass got red nut syndrome wtf is wrong with you!

Horny1: Doc I just had to finish the whole Mia Khalifa limited edition collection in one day!
Doctor Douche: oh fuck say no more fam put on sum Vaseline next time and take 5 shots o’ jack n you’ll be guud!

by Smoke and Fork Banger’s Club November 7, 2018

The Nut-Paradox

Every time you bust a nut, it is for one or two reasons. Most people say that it is because it feels good or for the post-but clarity, but the nut-paradox adds depth to the psychology behind masturbation. The nut paradox states that, any given individual who busts a nut does it to feel good, but there may be lingering effects of melancholy that rise up within you. A masturbatory paradox, you came here for a good time, but then after you realize and think “damn, I am alone.” You then question why you are single, look at your life’s choices, and find a multitude of answers within seconds. But you’re still sad after that nut. The paradox comes that you derive pleasure, but emotional loneliness as you realize you can’t marry your right hand (but you can put a ring on it). In conclusion, are are all horny and sad

Person 1: I just experienced the best and worst nut of my life:

Person 2: That doesn’t make sense?

Person 1: Well, it was a fire nut, but then I was depressed and realized that I was alone. Then I listened to Gut’s theme on loop in the hot shower.

Person 2: Damn….

The nut-paradox is the feeling of regret and loneliness after a fat nut.

by averagebeanenjoyer February 10, 2022