lettuce

when you get caught watching porn by your grandmothers pet monkey

"man i just lettuce"

by Snuugle July 3, 2022

Lettuce Spray

The act of spraying down a head of lettuce out of holy divinity with water or insecticides, or the act of requesting another person to do it for you out of some holy reverence.

"Please, in the name of God, lettuce spray before the insects get a hold of it or it dries out and wilts!"

by ANOTHERDEADROMEO March 8, 2023

Stirring the lettuce

When you’re tossing salad and the person doesn’t finish

He was barely stirring the lettuce in bed last night

by Dabberzzz January 27, 2022

Turkey Lettuce

noun-

stupid or untrue talk or writing; nonsense.
verb-
talk nonsense to (someone), typically to be misleading or deceptive.

“I heard he’s got 5 baby mamas”
“Girlll shut up that’s some turkey lettuce there ain’t no way”

by Tacobell1963 March 24, 2025

Lettuce

A nickname for somebody who is good at a subject but doesn't think they are

The lettuce student kept on practicing even while he had the topic to perfection.

by MushroomOmnomnom October 14, 2022

Lettuce Dildo

Similar to the phrase "let us pray" but rather "lettuce dildo" it is often stated to mark the beginning of a rather large orgy.

Adam begins, "I would like to welcome everyone to this 8 person orgy", Adam then holds up the dildo with both hands and states, "lettuce dildo" To which marks the official beginning of the orgy.

by Ohfuckthat11 October 3, 2017

Chip lettuce

A chip of your choice, broken up and put on a sand which or hogie of your choice.

I really like Doritos as my chip lettuce on my sand which!

by Banana hamock 1 January 30, 2018