A very drip tastic man whos very enthusiastic, He provides god like abilities to life and will enhance you as a person by 10x. But do be aware he is going to go on his 15 (if thats alright)<--(no longer applies)
also the handkerchief is drippy
also the handkerchief is drippy
by Charles Wilam Shirkling Wizard February 26, 2022

by PraisebetoDexter1133 February 9, 2022

by IrishBridgy July 13, 2022

The ghost of Boston’s forgotten founder, executed in 1631 for “witchcraft” after peacefully communicating with local Native tribes. Hanged in what’s now the Boston Common children’s park, John Boston returns every July 6th, the day he died.
Each year, he rises at midnight, hunting for the smelliest children under 15 to “rebuild the city he was denied.” Legend says the stinkier the kid, the more likely they are to vanish.
The city closes the park every July 6th to contain him — but when the gates are locked, he takes to the streets.
Each year, he rises at midnight, hunting for the smelliest children under 15 to “rebuild the city he was denied.” Legend says the stinkier the kid, the more likely they are to vanish.
The city closes the park every July 6th to contain him — but when the gates are locked, he takes to the streets.
Friend 1: “Hey, wanna hang out tomorrow?”
Friend 2: “Hell no, it’s John Boston’s day, and I haven’t showered. I ain’t tryna vanish into the trees, bro.”
Friend 2: “Hell no, it’s John Boston’s day, and I haven’t showered. I ain’t tryna vanish into the trees, bro.”
by Wsgg July 5, 2025

by CommanderKevin October 20, 2021

The inventor of the headache. Created when John Headache tried to think too hard in 1882. We hate this guy and his cursed invention.
Remember people, we were supposed to live a world free from thought. Thinking only makes brain sad and hurty.
Remember people, we were supposed to live a world free from thought. Thinking only makes brain sad and hurty.
"my head hurts wtf"
"You are likely experiencing a headache. These grievances were created by one John Headache. You have him and only him to blame. Stop thinking immediately to reduce harm."
"You are likely experiencing a headache. These grievances were created by one John Headache. You have him and only him to blame. Stop thinking immediately to reduce harm."
by TheRatEmpire November 8, 2023

Guy#1: Yoo, I heard he left his boys to get pegged by a girl.
Guy#2: Yea, he’s a Lucas John Zielinski.
Guy#2: Yea, he’s a Lucas John Zielinski.
by Z hater fr June 8, 2024
