taint shards

The pieces of shit that didn't get wiped off after talking a shit

I went down on my girlfriend last night, before I knew it a had eaten taint shards

by CandyFrank October 21, 2021

Taint Muffin

Someone who is being annoying and mean

Listen up you little taint muffin, you will give me your chocolate milk.

by PooBob April 17, 2021

Taint Whip

When struggling to maintain an erection during intercourse due to excess alcohol consumption, rather than penetration the flaccid penis just slaps against the taint

Brah #1: What happened to you last night?
Brah #2: I left the bar with that chick that girl who thought Sandra Bullock was the funniest talent in Hollywood, but instead of laying the pipe, the combination of Long Island Iced Teas and her recital of lines from The Heat caused me to taint whip for 3 hours until we both gave up.

by FakeTucci January 18, 2015

taint shooter

A man who shoots his Girlfriend(or boyfriend) in the taint after pulling out during sex.

just before he came he pulled out and jizz shot at her taint so he was called a taint shooter.

by Chrissy Some April 10, 2008

Upper Taint

The space at the top of your ass crack before it becomes a hole.

She tried to finger my asshole but she missed and touched my upper taint.

by uppertaintlvr42069 September 19, 2022

Taint Cream

The ointment one uses on their taint when it has an unbelievable amount of chafing and itchiness. Very useful in desperate times.

Hey Dillon, I heard you and Jarad were in need of taint cream.

Yea that was clutch, thanks.
No problem Phil.

by yungpad December 16, 2020

funky taint

A bad smell, stain, taste or similar. so bad that it draws up vomit to the back of your throte, and makes you dry-wretch.

omg that smells like shit man! you has got the funky taint.

by Bernard p November 13, 2007