Var-Sigma Male

A man who eats his own dick-cheese for breakfast, and washes them down with a clay-loam milkshake. A man who can smell a drop of cum wings from 10 miles away. A man who scalps his enemies — and has them begging for more. A man for whom the sigma lifestyle is too conventional; who paves his own path one chromosome at a time. The man who keeps "him" up at night.
"I heard you hooked up with Trent?"
"Yeah, he's a total var-sigma male"
by Wubby Counter-Terrorist March 17, 2024
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VAR

Video Action Reply.

Oddly this scientifically backed technological breakthrough is doubted by a small yet vocal collective of men from Sheffield, Stow & Granton who believe this mythical video technology is some mental government conspiracy to make football vile & rotten. There is no claim that it’s being used to Sheffield Wednesday’s advantage as they as pish as always. There is also evidence that the collective is actually one man.
A shaken Adam Prostley said: “I hate VAR & the council. They’re both vile rat 🐀 scum”.
by Riach December 11, 2020
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Var

It stands for "Vehicular Ass Raping" - otherwise known commonly as tailgating.
"This asshole is varring me"
by follow me on Instagram December 25, 2021
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VAR

Video review system introduced in football by Papa Infantino to give away penalties to Argentina.
It was supposed to make the game fairer but controversial decisions are still being made
Argentina has been so grossly favored by VAR decisions that people are starting to refer to this country as Vargentina.

Real Madrid has been so grossly favored by VAR decisions that people are starting to refer to this small team as Real Vardrid.
by RationalFootballFan from Chile November 19, 2023
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Var

Var is a noun to describe playful jealousy

This word comes from early 2023 made up by millennials to stay relevant and relatable to gen z but quickly disappeared the origins of exactly who made it is unknown
1“I’m so var of your cute new shoes

2“You’re just var because I have a cool bag
by Wise traveler July 10, 2024
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Var

A sexy male that has charming eyes and has a positive attitude. He is a unique person if you find a var don’t lose him
by God51 November 24, 2021
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VAR

The scenario: The rangers player got dribbled past in the box by a Celtic player from which he dived. The VAR Person is female.

Rangers player (still whinging): AHH! REF! PENALTY!!
The Celtic defender + goalie: Och! Get up the noo! Ya diver!
The Ref: Yeah thats a dive mate
VAR Person (saying in the refs earpiece): OH NO ITS NOT!
Ref: Its clear he did no touch him!
VAR Person: But, but, but the player is in my fantasy team!
Ref: So? He was a bloody meter away!
Var Person: But, but, but (starts crying) WAHHHH! IM A RANGERS FAN!!! WAHHHHH!
Ref: Ive got no choice
Ref: Sadly, its a pen.
Rangers player: YAYYYYY!!!
Var Person: YAYYYYYY! Now i can get back to Fortnite OG!
Celtic Defender: What in the hell are these guys on?
Goalie: They're high thats for sure.
Ref: *gives*
Rangers Player decides to punch the defender in the face
Ref: RED CARD! YOUR FUCKING OFF!
VAR Person: WAHHHHHHHH! HE'S IN MY FANTASY TEAM!!

Var person: I also have a fantasy of him fucking me with his 10 inch cock!
Ref: No fanfic in stadia!
Var person: But im the Var Person! And he's so hot! *Starts moaning rapidly*
Ref: AYE THATS IT! IM NO LISTENING TO YA! HE'S FUCKING OFF!
Var person: Great! Now he can fuck me in peace!
Ref: SORRY BUT YOU'VE NO GOT A CHANCE WITH HIM!

Ref: GET THE FUCK OFF THIS PITCH!
Rangers player: ok
Rangers takes the pen
They miss
Celtic win the scottish cup
They win the Champions League
The fanfic of the var person and rangers player will continue soon
VAR IS BULLSHIT
by Celtic forever November 15, 2023
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