Calculus

The mathematical equivalent of saying "probably" "maybe" or "don't know" instead of "absolutely" "certainly" or "definately"

Mother: "Yes or no, did you rob from the bank?"

Son: "Um well, probably, maybe I don't know. I don't remember"

Mother: "I want a straight answer, yes or no!"

Son: "Yes or no in this case is the equivalent of an indeterminate form in the Calculus branch of mathematics, they are integer values. Do integer values actually exist in this universe as they are absolute values? I am merely coming as close to these inexplorable limits as possible by exploring derivatives and close values. In this case these would best be expressed as "probably" or "don't know."

Mother: *Facepalms*

by Tintintinny whatever February 24, 2011

ap calculus

Class offered in some high schools. Introduces pretty basic mathematical concepts compared to "advanced" math. Frequently described as "impossible," "retarded," and "useless" by many students, but occasionally enjoyed by uber-nerds who later go on to become obscenely rich and hire the aforementioned students as manservants.

Joe Cool: "AP Calculus sucks monkey balls. Let's go get wasted."

Uber-nerd: "Wow, partial differential equations are fascinating. With some minor modifications, I bet these formulas could even predict the stock market..."

by The Dawg June 14, 2005

Calculus A

A soft version of calculus designed for the use of people with learning disabilities. Given the letter "A" as it is the most essential and basic level of calculus SON.

Calculus A student: whats a derivative?
Calculus 1 student: whats an anti-integral?

by Dietrich Burbulla January 10, 2011

calculus warrior wannabe

a calculus warrior with a casio calculator instead of a ti-83 or higher.

"God, your calculator sucks! Oh it's a casio! You calculus warrior wannabe!"

by The Scottish Muffinman November 25, 2009

Calculus

Calculus is a cruel and hard mistress. No one wants to do her because no one CAN do her. Except Chuck Norris. He can do her. Calculus is easy for him.

"Dude, did you do your calculus homework last night?"
"... We didn't have homework?"
"Chuck tester."

by DrakeS26 January 5, 2012

Caligula

A kick ass song made by rapper Zillakami.

“Yo did you hear that new album with Zilla?”
“Hell yeah Caligula is lit”

by zzzim November 25, 2018

Calculus

A branch of mathematics that is only useful for people trying to enter into certain fields of work, for the rest, it's completely useless. Sadly, universities in the United States require people in fields that have nothing to do with math to take this class in order to graduate, thus lowering there gpa, and making them seem less qualified as a result of a poor mark in a class that has nothing to do with their future career.

Dick: Ahhhh, so stressed!!!
Jane: whats wrong?
Dick: Ah nothing, just gotta a lot of calculus homework
Jane: Why are you taking calculus, aren't you trying to become a physical therapist?
Dick: Ya I am, but I have to take calculus in order to graduate.
Jane: Wow, that makes no sense

by tikwah April 6, 2011