The Equator Penis Measuring System (EPMS) is the system that gives an approximation of one's penis size. Generally speaking, the closer you live to the Ecuador, the larger your penis is. For example, Africans and Latin Americans living on the equator will have penises measuring around 11 or 12 inches hard, while the English and Scottish living up north have penises measuring 3 inches flaccid, or up to 5 inches hard. There are also intermediate points. Italians, for example, have penises about 6 inches flaccid, and 8 inches hard.
Example of the Equator Penis Measuring System
Canadian: Eh, my penis is aboot 3 inches.
Italian: What's a matta you, uh?? I got a 8 inch sausage! It could slap you and break-a your face!!
Black guy: Y'all niggas is small. I got 12 inches up in this muthafucka. Y'all my bitches now. SHIT JUST GOT REAL!!! SHIT JUST GOT REAL!!!
Canadian: Eh, my penis is aboot 3 inches.
Italian: What's a matta you, uh?? I got a 8 inch sausage! It could slap you and break-a your face!!
Black guy: Y'all niggas is small. I got 12 inches up in this muthafucka. Y'all my bitches now. SHIT JUST GOT REAL!!! SHIT JUST GOT REAL!!!
by rogerthewhale March 8, 2013
Get the Equator Penis Measuring Systemmug. “Certified side shaygo penis” is a term used by the most elite of shaygos. which is a moment that will be remembered by the boys.
by Big fungus 12 March 23, 2023
Get the certified side Shaygo penismug. A PEFF (penis eating fag fairy) is a male homosexual fairy that goes from house to house stealing men's penises while they are sleeping and they eat them
Paul: DAD!!!
Dad: what?
Paul: my penis is gone
Dad: I guess a penis eating fag fairy stopped by our house last night
Paul: you think?
Dad: yep, because mine is gone too!
Dad: what?
Paul: my penis is gone
Dad: I guess a penis eating fag fairy stopped by our house last night
Paul: you think?
Dad: yep, because mine is gone too!
by Ruinedflower347 May 19, 2016
Get the penis eating fag fairymug. An always-stiff-penis. A penis of such small stature, it fails to have the length to hang down, hence, being always stiff.
Also known as, an Always Stiff "Peeper," rather than penis.
Also known as, an Always Stiff "Peeper," rather than penis.
Example: I was changing in the locker room today with the guys, then I looked of at Tommy, an he was sporting a tiny dick, possibly an A.S.P (Always Stiff Penis).
Example: Dude, after I banged her, I took a cold shower, and came out. She threw off the towel because she wanted to give me head. She looked up and said, where'd it go? I must have an A.S.P (Always Stiff Penis).
Example: Dude, after I banged her, I took a cold shower, and came out. She threw off the towel because she wanted to give me head. She looked up and said, where'd it go? I must have an A.S.P (Always Stiff Penis).
by Leverett Thomas Holder November 8, 2009
Get the A.S.P (Always Stiff Penis)mug. (n.) A closet homosexual male. Acts homophobic around his friends to try and disguise his true love for the penis.
Started by nugluh on YouTube.
Started by nugluh on YouTube.
That Chuck Norris character is a little tooo masculine... could he possibly be an Under Cover Penis Lover?
by teenybeeny December 9, 2008
Get the Under Cover Penis Lovermug. A relationship of a couple owning just one penis. This implies presumably also the ownership of a vagina.
Patricia and James live now together. They started a regular single penis relationship (SPR) after some turbulences. Cp. to Double Penis Relationship (DPR) and Zero Penis Relationship (ZPR).
by ThePhysopher September 25, 2016
Get the Single Penis Relationship (SPR)mug. 1. primal, carnal urges that oppose one's reasoned judgements.
2. similar to "deep down in my heart" but more crude, and doesn't reference one's feelings of love, affection, or idealism.
3. one's wants that appeal to using things and services for pure, selfish, pleasure, regardless of consequences. (ex. sex, drugs, alcohol, fighting)
2. similar to "deep down in my heart" but more crude, and doesn't reference one's feelings of love, affection, or idealism.
3. one's wants that appeal to using things and services for pure, selfish, pleasure, regardless of consequences. (ex. sex, drugs, alcohol, fighting)
Bro: She was so gone last night, and was saying weird, fucked up shit. I couldn't bang her.
Homie: Hey man I totally understand, and I think you did the right thing.
Bro: But dude....like deep down in my penis....I totally wanted to be all up in that =D!!!
Guy: My boss has been up my ass all week and now he wants me to come in on Saturday.
Dude: Wow, that sucks. You shoulda told him to go fuck himself.
Guy: And lose my job? Fuck outta here! But seriously dude, deep down in my penis, I want to smash his stupid "#1 Dad" coffee mug in his fuckin face....but I'm a pussy =(.
Homie: Hey man I totally understand, and I think you did the right thing.
Bro: But dude....like deep down in my penis....I totally wanted to be all up in that =D!!!
Guy: My boss has been up my ass all week and now he wants me to come in on Saturday.
Dude: Wow, that sucks. You shoulda told him to go fuck himself.
Guy: And lose my job? Fuck outta here! But seriously dude, deep down in my penis, I want to smash his stupid "#1 Dad" coffee mug in his fuckin face....but I'm a pussy =(.
by [DZ] July 25, 2013
Get the Deep down in my penismug.