A performance involving the concurrent consumption of beer, and public urination. The performer typically executes this by synchronizing the production of urine with the initiation of a "waterfall" stylistic-drinking manoeuvre, and shall attempt to demonstrate technical artistry by actively controlling the volumetric beer flow-rate in precise response to changes sensed in the urine stream pressure-drop.
Sufficiently skillful execution results in a suspension of disbelief for all observers of the intended suggestion, viz., that the beer is indeed flowing directly between the performer's esophagus and distal urinary meatus, mysteriously circumventing the natural physiological processes which ordinarily conduct such fluid transport operations over a considerably longer time frame.
Sufficiently skillful execution results in a suspension of disbelief for all observers of the intended suggestion, viz., that the beer is indeed flowing directly between the performer's esophagus and distal urinary meatus, mysteriously circumventing the natural physiological processes which ordinarily conduct such fluid transport operations over a considerably longer time frame.
Observer 1: (Hands a can of beer to the performer)
Performer: (Unseals the can, assumes a customary urination stance and takes out his penis)
Observer 1: "Yea, though the very notion of it be most incredulous, verily I am compelled to inquire: Do you truly mean to void your water, unduly in my presence, bro?"
Observer 2: "I beg to assure you bro, with the entirety of my conviction, that the scene which unfolds before us is not one of capricious folly! But lo, what sport! Indeed, what exquisite fortune! For bro means to gift the lot of us with the hallowed spectacle of a Fountain of Archimedes!"
Performer: (Begins simultaneously pissing and pouring beer from the can into his mouth)
Observer 1: "Good God, bro! But what fantastic machinations must bro be cloistering in his very form, that might afford him the commission of such a prodigious feat? I find myself overcome by titillation, bro, inundating my senses and, yea, my very wit to such a degree that surely I shall have to swoon down upon the earth this very instant if I am to retain any semblance of dignity! And shall I dare to regale my bros in absentia with such unconscionable witness, on pain of being rightly diminished in credibility to that of some crazed, braying beast, its brains having been riven with holes from foraging upon a most devilish specimen of the noxious weeds - ...."
(Everyone else has left)
Performer: (Unseals the can, assumes a customary urination stance and takes out his penis)
Observer 1: "Yea, though the very notion of it be most incredulous, verily I am compelled to inquire: Do you truly mean to void your water, unduly in my presence, bro?"
Observer 2: "I beg to assure you bro, with the entirety of my conviction, that the scene which unfolds before us is not one of capricious folly! But lo, what sport! Indeed, what exquisite fortune! For bro means to gift the lot of us with the hallowed spectacle of a Fountain of Archimedes!"
Performer: (Begins simultaneously pissing and pouring beer from the can into his mouth)
Observer 1: "Good God, bro! But what fantastic machinations must bro be cloistering in his very form, that might afford him the commission of such a prodigious feat? I find myself overcome by titillation, bro, inundating my senses and, yea, my very wit to such a degree that surely I shall have to swoon down upon the earth this very instant if I am to retain any semblance of dignity! And shall I dare to regale my bros in absentia with such unconscionable witness, on pain of being rightly diminished in credibility to that of some crazed, braying beast, its brains having been riven with holes from foraging upon a most devilish specimen of the noxious weeds - ...."
(Everyone else has left)
by spider kidsz April 24, 2025
Get the Fountain of Archimedesmug. When you are fucking a male/female and your about to bust pull out, grab your nuts, jerk off, and release your nuts and yell fountain of youth while simultaneously giving your girl a laser precise cumshot up her left nostril and the Coriolis effect should take affect in the nasal cavity and the pure force of your cum will shoot out the back of her neck and go up to heaven and retrieve her soul before she enters the gate so then you need to put her ice on a frozen bed of your cum to preserve her and on the 3rd day at exactly 4:19:21 PM start jerking off over her body and shoot a load into her belly button and she will be resurrected and will be your slave for eternity.
by Codyboi30 April 1, 2022
Get the Fountain of youthmug. by Jesse Flies May 14, 2023
Get the Fountain Fairymug. When sitting on the toilet, urinating skyward (as a reflex to the natural urge to pee after dropping a deuce) due to the boner obtained while watching porn.
John tagged himself with a golden stream in a post porcelain porn fountain after watching tranny hooker porn.
by StinkyZ May 24, 2016
Get the Post Porcelain Porn Fountainmug. In the tradition of the Roman Fountain, this position starts with a man standing while receiving a blowjob from a girl in a seated position. The girl, while pleasuring her man, should also be breast feeding her child giving the Roman Fountain a uniquely southern twist. In southern tradition, the child does not necessarily have to belong to the gentleman.
Dude, my balls are killing me. I've got to get some satisfaction but my girl is constantly breast feeding our newborn. Player, have her give you a Southern Fountain while she's feeding then that'll take care of both issues at once.
by Beaner 1 August 22, 2017
Get the Southern Fountainmug. pouring water into a stripper/hookers asshole, from which they proceed to fart or shart, spewing the water out ready for drinking.
by Willsmithspapa420 October 3, 2024
Get the West Philly Water Fountainmug. by Taxopoo July 7, 2022
Get the Australian fountainmug.