Monkey Arm

A well-formed turd that is long enough to wrap around.

She got to the toilet just in time to pinch off a foot-long steaming monkey arm.

by Garbage Heap August 1, 2020

Switch Monkey

A guy or girl that may be very attractive one day and floor-ugly the next.

I saw crazy Stacy at the bar on Wednesday and she was looking rough, then Saturday I asked for her number not even knowing it was her. That's a switch monkey for you.

by dunbfore June 23, 2010

Girth Monkeys

Used when referring to a large set of breasts.

A: Damn dude did you see Jayce’s Girth monkeys last night?!
B: Yeah dude they were buckin!

by Giggittygiggitygoo February 9, 2019

UX Monkey

A person who claims to have knowledge of the field of UX, but is actually devoid of any knowledge of the field. The problem is rooted in the combination of self-delusion, self-grandiosity, self-righteousness, and an inability to see what UX truly is in reality.

Some schools that offer UX cetifications are factories that produce UX monkeys, as they cajole oblivious people with the promise of imparting real knowledge that is in fact superficial.

UX Designer: What do you think of the hamburger menu on this site?

UX Monkey: What's that? The menu at a fast food joint?

UX Designer: Ummm ... the one in which there are options housed in a navigation drawer. Didn't you learn this from your UX degree?

UX Monkey: Yeah. I don't know. All we do is make wireframes and stuff.

UX Designer: Bro, I think you're a UX monkey.

by notanothermonkey February 8, 2018

Flab Monkey

The fat friend of your group. Often is into and collects worthless junk. Usually eats pizza for breakfast.

Chris is such a flab monkey.

by Dr. KLUE October 1, 2008

jump the monkey

When a woman returns home after a long and boring day working in a restaurant with the sole aim of getting shagged silly. Her advances lack subtlety as she just grabs at the man´s genitals demanding coitus. When faced with any resistance she jumps on the unaccommodating male and rides him into oblivion.

Nicky: Hey Amanda, do you fancy a drink after work?
Amanda: Nah, I don´t think so.
Nicky: Why not? Are you off home to jump the monkey?
Amanda: Yeah, I am fucking gagging for it.
Nicky: Crikey!!

by FurbyFuck10 November 26, 2015

Kitchen monkey

Another word for a woman. They are always running around making sandwiches like monkeys in a kitchen.

Son: wow dad mom needs to calm down it’s just pasta
Dad: yep that’s a kitchen monkey for you

by FamousJew February 26, 2020