Table snake

A game played at dinner parties and other events. A male puts his penis on the table and waits for someone to notice by yelling "table snake!"
Whoever can go unnoticed the longest wins.

We played table snake at the Christmas party last night. Johnny won when it took 10mins for anyone to notice that his snake wasn't just a misplaced cabana.

by Professor Rosseforp March 10, 2021

before-table

A group of especially unattractive subjects occupying public group furniture. Term is adapted from the label on the initial image of a set of before/after pictures commonly used to illustrate the effectiveness of a product or service advertised to improve one's image.

Did you see the chicks at the before-table when we entered? For a second, I thought we walked onto the set of an infomercial.

by hitbyageo April 25, 2004

Table addict

Someone who packages so much heroin for street sale that contact with the drug causes them to become addicted, even though they don't inject or snort it deliberately.

At her sentencing hearing, Kimberly McIntosh told the federal judge that she had cut and processed so much heroin during her time as comptroller for the Black Guerilla Family that she become addicted, even though she's not a user.

"So you're a table addict," the judge replied.

by stuntmidget January 16, 2012

table for hov

Table for hov; When you dine alone & book a restaurant for your lonely self as your friends are non- exsistant or your group can’t decide on take away always that one friend that wants to eat at that same crusty spot, get your self a table for hov then.

Caller; Hi can I get a table for hov please?

Restaurant; You again? Of course you can you lonely fuck, mates bailed out on you again?

by LGS RAVES November 23, 2022

table trash

Sluts found at pool halls. Asks you to teach her to play pool so you can bend her over the table. Constantly strokes the pool stick mimicking a bad handjob.

The pool table is surrounded by table trash.

by Hafnerd August 16, 2019

Table Party

A table party involves the use of a glass table, and a minimum of two people. One person lays under the glass table, while the other person takes a shit on the glass. Table parties are one of the few shit party games, as several people can participate at once.

I ran out of glass cleaner while cleaning up after last night's table party.

by sqitso March 31, 2008

table surf

The table surf is the act of looking for another table that is better than the one you are either sitting at or planning to sit at.

Me: Matt, don't table surf, just sit the fuck down.
Matt: Fine, whatever.

by Andrew space October 7, 2006