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bedtime paradox

A thing that you think of before you go to sleep that keeps you up to two in the morning, while you despise the thing that made you think it.

What happens when Pinocchio says his nose will now grow?
-Brought to you by Rayne Jenkins
"OH MIIII GOOODDDD" FRIGGING BEDTIME PARADOX
by Aberaham Lincoln November 18, 2017
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rock paradox

by sabeebee December 1, 2017
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Tillich-Walker Paradox

The Tillich-Walker paradox is a paradox that occurs when an individual has sufficient statistical knowledge to know the power necessary, or the requisite n sample size to draw meaningful conclusions about a sample pool of sexual partners, yet due precisely to this eggheaded knowledge they are unlikely to attract a sufficient number of mates to ever attain statistical significance in their own sample of sexual partners.
Oh man, Christian Tillich-Walker knows how many partners he needs, but he'll never be able to reach that number, I guess that's why they call it the Tillich-Walker paradox!
by tom32 March 15, 2018
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sigma paradox

The Sigma paradox happens with thirds mainly e.g 1/3 = 33.333 repeating 2/3 = 66.666 repeating and 3/3 = 99.999 repeating. 3/3 is q whole number equaling 1 however it can't equal 1 because it is 99.9 repeating get it? It comes ever closer too 100% but will never get there. You can relate, in sure.
Bruh. Your life is pretty much a Sigma Paradox!
What?
You will NEVER SUCCEED ;)
by pseudonym1583622891 May 3, 2016
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self-help paradox

The age-old conundrum of "people who seek self-improvement vs. people who need self-improvement" --- generally speaking, the people who are conscientious and unashamedly self-examining enough to actively seek ways to improve themselves do not really need to self-improve very much, whereas the people who truly do need to improve themselves will not admit that they even HAVE a self-inadequacy problem, and so they arrogantly/impatiently refuse to seek or accept help in improving their character or behavior (think, the infamous "getters gettin' got" conversation between Madea and Dr. Phil).
Client, to counsellor, at the outset of their weekly meeting: Breaker one-five for reality check --- come on back?
Counsellor, playing along: Yeah, go ahead, Breaker --- reading you wall-to-wall and treetop-tall.
Client: Thanks --- that's a big ten-four, good buddy. Well, I'm in the process of trying to improve myself, and so I thought I'd send a random shout-out over the waves to check my progress. I've been trying to be more sociable and patient and helpful to everyone, visualize things more from their perspective, and so on.
Counsellor: Well, eights and other good numbers to you on THAT one, good buddy --- that's certainly a positive start. Have you tried self-help books?
Client: Oh, a great BIG ten-four THERE, good buddy --- I've read at least a half-dozen of 'em cover-to-cover, and loved every page; the problem, though, is that I never seem to find any new ideas --- most everything in there is stuff I already know about and am actively practicing, so the books just reassuringly confirm the nature and wisdom of my efforts, not provide fresh perspectives for further improvement.
Counsellor: Ah... well, ten-four, good buddy --- I totally "get you" there... the old "self-help paradox", eh?? The only people who'll read those books are ones who don't need 'em!
by QuacksO February 3, 2017
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Twin paradox

When one identical twin calls the other one ugly; is she really calling herself ugly?
“Solchelys said that her twin sister Solrelys is butt ugly, but she looks just like her? It’s that twin paradox.”
by Huh 2020 November 2, 2019
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Car Climate Paradox

When someone raises the car temperature to make it warm inside the car when it’s cold outside, even though you wore coyotes for the cold weather causing you to become hot very quickly
“I keep telling Susan that the Car Climate Paradox is making her hot in her car during the winter”
by BravoArmstrong December 3, 2020
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