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Phonics Monkey

The Phonics Monkey from that one episode of South Park where Cartman misspelled CHAIR in a spelling bee. When Cartman tried to get help from the phonics monkey, it just started beating off behind its drumbset.
A consumer report included the growing number of returns of the infamous reading product, the Phonics Monkey, which just turns out to be a degenerate species of bonobo chimp.
by aka_Pyro April 6, 2007
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crass monkey

A mixture of Four Loko and orange juice. A play on the traditional "brass monkey," consisting of a 40 of malt liquor and OJ.

Also known as "an even poorer man's mimosa."
Four Loko and orange juice? That is one tasty crass monkey!
by jgoodson28 January 24, 2011
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Switch Monkey

A guy or girl that may be very attractive one day and floor-ugly the next.
I saw crazy Stacy at the bar on Wednesday and she was looking rough, then Saturday I asked for her number not even knowing it was her. That's a switch monkey for you.
by dunbfore June 23, 2010
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Monkey Poon

Noun
1. The act of getting sexual pleasure from a female
2. The pussy area of a female
3. A smelly vagina
1. "Yo last night was crazy as hell! I got some sweet monkey poon from Laquisha!"
by CoolConnor1985 November 2, 2010
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Tech Monkey

Someone who is really interested and passionate about technology. Not to be confused with "code monkey".
Geoff: "Hey nice Android Phone, does it have the 2.2 update yet?" Allison: "No idea, it's just a phone, you're such a Tech Monkey."
by Gee.... November 21, 2010
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cell monkey

A person who is ostensibly unable to walk, chew gum, sit, eat, drink, sleep, work, shop, drive, breathe, take a crap, or accomplish any other task commonly performed with or without opposable digits, unless a cell phone is inexorably attached to the side of their head.

This person is typically oblivious to almost all stimuli around them including any carbon-based life forms, merging traffic, lights at intersections, toll booth gates, falling pianos, the cashier in front of them, the check-out line behind them, the person they've just walked in front of, the inappropriateness of their loud phone rants, or anything else involving sight, sound or smell (such as the fungus slowly growing on the mouth and ear piece of the greasy device).

Ironically, it has been shown that when placed in a room with other family members and friends, but without the cellular appliance, this person has alarmingly little to say to any of them. This time spent communicating face to face has been estimated to be a mere fraction of the corresponding period spent talking to the same people through the device, and at great and perpetual urgency.
Get off the phone and drive cell monkey.

It's your turn dumbass! STFU and write the check or run your debit. This store has gotta ban the freaking cell monkeys in checkout lines?

Hey cell monkey, your fly is open and you're standing in front of the forklift.
by idiot emptor April 24, 2009
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stoop monkey

Most likely involving members of the black community "posted up" on their front steps...or "stoop". Usually for a duration of time longer than the normal 8-hour workday. Most likely dressed in white-T's, sometimes involving brown paper bagged 40's, and occassionally joints behind the ear.
"You would not believe how many stoop monkeys are out today"
by K&M est. 2003 August 19, 2008
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