Church Gas

Grouchy, church-going grandmas will often allow hot, putrid methane gas to slowly seep from their wrecked buttholes in hopes that everyone sitting around them will catch a good whiff. Church gas is vindictive, purposeful and is used to get back at the congregation for one reason, or another.

1) Yo, what up Dre?... Damn, is Grandma up in this hizzy? Smells like massive church gas 'round here!

2) Pastor Dan punished me by requiring me to wipe down all the church pews because a grandma church gassed during his sermon.

by tbizzy2 August 21, 2019

Neon Church

A slang word for a “blow job” after being sodomized in the anus.

I pulled out of her ass and shoved it in her ass, my girlfriend enjoyed neon church this morning.

by Drugsbitch December 22, 2018

church fatigue

The miserable, hot, sticky, depressed fatigue that overwhelms you during a service, particularly one with lots of standing and singing. Causes you to slump your shoulders and groan with its weight. Immediate relief surges through you when you sit down.

Dude, you look hammered!

nah man, just some serious church fatigue.

Ugh, that last hymn was so long!

Yeah. I got church fatigue so bad, I could hardly breathe.

by patrick_astronaut October 6, 2013

God Church

A word used by a mentally ill non-human youtuber named jack paule. Basically he's retarded.

Jack Paul: Hey babe-
Totally fine non-retarded girlfriend: Hey you're kinda retarded so i'm breaking up with you
Jack paul: WHAT!!... BUT... by the way my new merch is selling like a GOD CHURCH
* Speech 0 *

by jaCK Paule July 15, 2019

Church of Rachel

Rachel is an almighty vampire. and here at the Church of Rachel we celebrate death, destruction, violence, and jeffree star. so come child, and confess your sins, we won't judge, only praise you for that murder you committed last fall. D:
welcome to insanity, how may i help you?

DEEP INSIDE THE CHURCH OF RACHEL:
(someone there to confess a sin) "Rachel, i told someone vampires don't exist."
(rachel) *bitch slaps confessor* NEVER TELL SUCH LIES. D:<
(confessor) im sorry D:
(rachel) you are forgiven D:
*hugs*
(rachel) *secretly steals confessors wallet*

by rachel :DDD January 27, 2008

church girl

An overly religious girl who does anal and oral sex because she thinks it means that she didn’t lose her virginity. She is the biggest hoe you will ever meet. She usually would go to a private or boarding school. She’s sinned so much, that God can’t even forgive her.

“Yeah she’s a church girl!”
“That church girl’s really nice!”

by master1100 May 20, 2018

Church Pyoo

church-pyu <---pernounse like that

while in church (or any other religious ceremony/praisy thing) someone farts loudly (or softly) and everyone looks at the certain person and makes a mean face.

often happens to a foolish person.

Max: Duuude did you hear?
Sam: What?
Max: Josh told me that in church the other day some person farted really loud and every person gave her a dumb look.
Sam: *laughs* haha wow, was it Jordan?
Max: Probably...
Sam: She is so Church Pyoo prone.
Max: Sad..

by Greenissocool141 September 2, 2009