While at you your bachelor party in Denver, one of your best buds slips laxative into your drink without you knowing. So you go to get your lap dance and suddenly can no longer hold your shit inside your body, and just let it go. Your getting married in a week anyways so who cares.
by Bobby "Moist" Barnes November 09, 2008
to take a dump that is so relieving that you may have to lean back and make yourself so comfortable or get into some strange positions, basically giving the toilet a personal 1 on 1
OMG!!!! I been holding this in so long today, when i get home I'm gonna give the toilet a lap dance.
by popsiclelover August 18, 2009
When a woman pays a stripper to piss or shit on the woman's breast. Aka when R-kelly did to an underage girl.
by The_Blue_Mikaw April 10, 2019
Father: What you did was wrong and I'm going to have to spank you unless you give daddy a lap dance.
And that is an example of a lap dance option dad.
And that is an example of a lap dance option dad.
by Deep blue 2012 November 17, 2009
To show kindness to another. To preform an act of charity unexpectedly. Made popular by the Todd N Tyler Radio Empire.
Jim: I was at the supermarket and this midget couldn't get to the Doritos on the top shelf. So got them down for her.
Bob: It always feels good to give an old man a lap dance.
Bob: It always feels good to give an old man a lap dance.
by Reverend Jim Jr April 18, 2008
The last excuse for not doing something without admitting to laziness. Often used by cat owners and drunks/meth whores
Mom: Timothy, take out the trash!
Tim: I will.
Mom: No, NOW!
Tim: I'm busy.
Mom: BULLSHIT!
Tim: But, I have a cat in my lap!
Bill: Ted, can you hand me a beer.
Ted: Go gret it yershelf....
Bill: Dude, it's right there.
Ted: .....MraI have a crat in m'lap.....
Bill: There's nothing there...where are your pants? ...You have shit on your dick.
Tim: I will.
Mom: No, NOW!
Tim: I'm busy.
Mom: BULLSHIT!
Tim: But, I have a cat in my lap!
Bill: Ted, can you hand me a beer.
Ted: Go gret it yershelf....
Bill: Dude, it's right there.
Ted: .....MraI have a crat in m'lap.....
Bill: There's nothing there...where are your pants? ...You have shit on your dick.
by imthatawesome September 14, 2012
Molly: ah ha how gay is tang...
Me: yo son back it up a lil, yo sittin on my lap standin!
Sitting on my lap while standing... lol
Me: yo son back it up a lil, yo sittin on my lap standin!
Sitting on my lap while standing... lol
by BigLeet September 20, 2008