After fucking a girl in the ass, you wipe the shit off your dick under the girls nose for the mustache and then punch her in the eye to give her a black eye for a patch.
by D43M0N July 7, 2010
Get the Dirty Captainmug. Is a puke that is self important with one or more tragic character flaws. Usually these pricks pretend to be all about the war but have some piss poor excuse for not going but every reason in the world any other male might go. This type of asshole will listen to and pretend to understand rap. He will be anti-Semitic but not understand what a Jew is from a hole in the ground. He will have a real big time problem with "jack offs" despite being the worst possible kind of jack off. They also have a real problem with fat boys and take the controversial stance of being against "perverts" or "pedophiles" three times an hour. Captain fucks might also be known as one legged scuba divers if they are veterans or pretending to be veterans. Captain fucks are almost always rich boys, yuppies, red necks and/or pussy fucking old farts. A female that might act like this is not called captain fuck. She is just a cunt.
Michael Scott and Dwight Schrute from the TV show The Office are cutesy, watered down, safe for TV captain fucks.
by captain fuck May 11, 2010
Get the captain fuckmug. emaciated small asian concubine, occassionally drips slime off of body. Loves to violate animals of all kinds ranging from trolls to insects.
Distinguishing characteristics:
1. Loves to run around without pants
2. Has dry chapped skin usually covered in Cetaphil
3. Has extremely ugly face contortions
4. Has frisky hands
5. Enjoys small dogs, especially ones that can't get away
6. Emaciated.
However, Captain fugly has the occassional nice..ness...
which makes her very loveable and cuddly...if you want to start bleeding.
Also answers to the name:
JIAJIA
Captain foogly
No seriously shes cool.
<3 JIAJIA
Distinguishing characteristics:
1. Loves to run around without pants
2. Has dry chapped skin usually covered in Cetaphil
3. Has extremely ugly face contortions
4. Has frisky hands
5. Enjoys small dogs, especially ones that can't get away
6. Emaciated.
However, Captain fugly has the occassional nice..ness...
which makes her very loveable and cuddly...if you want to start bleeding.
Also answers to the name:
JIAJIA
Captain foogly
No seriously shes cool.
<3 JIAJIA
by Lehsah January 2, 2008
Get the Captain Fuglymug. A lame superhero from the Ratcher and Clank series. Wears green spandex with a lightning bolt on his chest and had sex with a monkey in one of the games in the series. He loses his reputation and somehow gains it back over and over during this whole series. He got angry at Ratchet and is quoted saying "He is definitely off my top 5" referring to myspace.
Qwark can be related to The Green Lantern or Aquaman, stating that he can barley do shit and should not be considered a superhero.
Qwark can be related to The Green Lantern or Aquaman, stating that he can barley do shit and should not be considered a superhero.
Captain Qwark: I am Captain Qwark, the greatest superhero of the galaxy.
Ratchet: Yeah Yeah.
Rachet 5 seconds later: *Shoots*
Ratchet: Yeah Yeah.
Rachet 5 seconds later: *Shoots*
by TacoMann May 26, 2009
Get the Captain Qwarkmug. this describes anyone who has used a cucumber as a sexual instrument(usually through the rectum) rather than a vegetable
random guy: ''hey! how long do you take in the bathroom man''
other random guy (in bathroom): ''umn.....not long'' (groans)
1st random guy: (opens bathroom door and witnesses a large cucumber hanging from the other random guys ass with a dumbstruck look on his face)
''oh my god, CAPTAIN CUCUMBER, i knew it!
other random guy (in bathroom): ''umn.....not long'' (groans)
1st random guy: (opens bathroom door and witnesses a large cucumber hanging from the other random guys ass with a dumbstruck look on his face)
''oh my god, CAPTAIN CUCUMBER, i knew it!
by the enchanted lemon of hermitage October 15, 2007
Get the captain cucumbermug. A boss/supervisor who puts everyone else down to cover up their own inadequacies. Constantly overworking staff, under appreciating them and doing very little themselves. Their ultimate specialty is delegation. They berate staff to their fellow workmates to justify their own superficial, pathetic existence. Usually fat, ugly and angry at the world.
Look out, here comes Captain Choda, I wonder what we've done wrong now......
Warning, Captain Choda is on the war path.
Warning, Captain Choda is on the war path.
by Dr Rox July 26, 2016
Get the captain chodamug. When you longbottom so hard you don't look like yourself pre-puberty, much like how Steve Rogers didn't look the same pre- and post- serum.
by orbitalUncertainty April 7, 2018
Get the Captain America'dmug.