A direct competitor to the for-profit Sperm Bank, the Sperm Credit Union is a co-operative sperm banking venture owned collectively by depositors, who are known as members. Through careful management and economy, it can pay a little more or charge a little less as it had no outside stockholders seeking profit at members' expense.
The same pattern held in other sectors where small, local credit unions had taken on large, greedy for-profit banks. Make a deposit in Blood Credit Union and they bleed you a little less aggressively than the corporate hacks at Blood Bank. Withdraw noodles from the local Food Credit Union and be able to repay a few noodles less than would be charged by a greedy, Wall Street Food Bank. And on it goes.
The principle is the same as any other mutual or co-operative society, such as Mutual Orgasm as an insurance provider or the Building Societies as mortgage lenders. By taking matters into their own hands, members collectively obtain a more satisfying outcome.
The same pattern held in other sectors where small, local credit unions had taken on large, greedy for-profit banks. Make a deposit in Blood Credit Union and they bleed you a little less aggressively than the corporate hacks at Blood Bank. Withdraw noodles from the local Food Credit Union and be able to repay a few noodles less than would be charged by a greedy, Wall Street Food Bank. And on it goes.
The principle is the same as any other mutual or co-operative society, such as Mutual Orgasm as an insurance provider or the Building Societies as mortgage lenders. By taking matters into their own hands, members collectively obtain a more satisfying outcome.
I was initially sceptical when that trollop Beth tried to seduce me into becoming a member. What, pray tell, is a Sperm Credit Union? This sounded like something out of the idealistic free-love Summer of '69 where the Sexual Revolution, fuelled by the Pill and not yet castrated by full-scale STD panic, led to massive orgies of excess where everyone belongs to everyone else. And these Annual General Meetings? They sounded like something out of a porn flick, Bukkake Gangbang part 666.
Then she sat me down and opened the books, reviewing the prospectus and the annual reports. The business model appeared sound; infertile couples pay to borrow members' DNA — both sperm and eggs — to build their families and secure their future. Members deposit their seed and earn interest. Much like a bank, every one of the hundreds of millions of sperm every day would be individually counted, frozen, accounted for and secured. Every one of them. Everything was strictly regulated and deposits nationally insured up to a limit of a half-million sperm. Compared to the shambolic wreckage of the rest of the US banking system, the Sperm Credit Union was fiscally-prudent and well managed.
Then she sat me down and opened the books, reviewing the prospectus and the annual reports. The business model appeared sound; infertile couples pay to borrow members' DNA — both sperm and eggs — to build their families and secure their future. Members deposit their seed and earn interest. Much like a bank, every one of the hundreds of millions of sperm every day would be individually counted, frozen, accounted for and secured. Every one of them. Everything was strictly regulated and deposits nationally insured up to a limit of a half-million sperm. Compared to the shambolic wreckage of the rest of the US banking system, the Sperm Credit Union was fiscally-prudent and well managed.
by bitchuck September 03, 2024
That bloke had a few too many at the pub and punched a lollipop lady in the tit on his stumble home. He’s a real Union Jack Off.
by Patty Winters March 17, 2024
Person one: Who are you and why are you in my house?
Person two: I'm a member of the Union County Highschool Patriot Band.
.
"Golf on three. 1, 2, 3"
Person two: I'm a member of the Union County Highschool Patriot Band.
.
"Golf on three. 1, 2, 3"
by Evan 🌱 November 21, 2021
A union meeting is considered code word among railroad workers for sitting around the hotel having a drinking session. It sounds official so the supervisors will have no clue what is taking place, thus to remain under the radar. This usually takes place in the hotel lobby where a bunch of guys get drunk and bitch about the railroad.
On the radio passing by: Guys, we will be having a union meeting tonight at 21:00 to discuss important information about the new contract.
In front of a supervisor: Randy had a union meeting without me at the hotel. I’ll have to follow up with him to get the summary.
One on one: Are you prepared for the union meeting when we make it hotel?
In front of a supervisor: Randy had a union meeting without me at the hotel. I’ll have to follow up with him to get the summary.
One on one: Are you prepared for the union meeting when we make it hotel?
by 3:33 Bandit January 03, 2023
by TheWheelOfTruth April 26, 2020
Union Pacific was born 100 years ago. they will be on time. they are a great big rollin railroad everybody knows
by helloguysiamstupid April 17, 2021
A railroad that stalks people in the middle of the night by parking in the middle of a residential neighborhood. They often use the same engine number and same crew to do it.
The Union Pacific 8pm Pervert driving engine 4091 is once again peeping in my neighbors’ upstairs window
by A person who exists February 28, 2025