before-table

A group of especially unattractive subjects occupying public group furniture. Term is adapted from the label on the initial image of a set of before/after pictures commonly used to illustrate the effectiveness of a product or service advertised to improve one's image.

Did you see the chicks at the before-table when we entered? For a second, I thought we walked onto the set of an infomercial.

by hitbyageo April 25, 2004

Table Simping

The act of being submissive to a person simply because they bought a table at a nightclub. Typically occurs when a dude with daddy's money isn't funny or capable of speaking to women, so he spends $5-10k on a table and invites a hot girl with 30+ bodies to stand next to him at his table. The girl wears a slutty cocktail dress and the guy wears ripped light wash jeans, Yeezy's, a gold chain on the outside of his shirt, and a black t-shirt so tight it might as well be painted on. The entire concept is adjacent to prostitution. It's an easy way for beta men to fuck a whore without 'technically' paying for it.

"Hey friends, I was thinking of having a group dinner at my place this Thursday. Maybe cook up some chicken parm and sip some wine while we watch the sunset! Are you interested?"

"No, sorry, I'm going to see insert no-name DJ tonight. Steve from the Seaport is buying $1,500 bottles of shitty Tito's at a nightclub the size of my bedroom, so I'm gonna go table simping."

by artfuldodger69 August 19, 2022

table family

a family who believe they own the ice rink or sports area.

a hairy man wearing a baseball cap.
& various family including a daughter who dances, growls, never changes clothes and only has her fringe cut bowl head when visiting annual hairdressers.

BELIEVED TO LIVE UNDER THE TABLE DUE TO MORE THAN REGULAR OCCURANCE AT ICE RINK

Samantha; there! there they are

Alex: who's that?

Samantha; the family that live under the table!

Alex; they live under the table?!

Samantha; Yeah the table family, they live off stolen chips.

Alex; oooooo shes growling...

by themoonfromthestarsisabigworld January 3, 2010

Table with no chair

a table with no chairs you fucking idiot

There is a table with no chairs.

by Zhio March 27, 2022

session-table

Table with height not exceeding 20 cm, used for holding beer, tobacco, drug paraphenalia inc. mirrors etc. during a session. The lower the table the better 'cos everybody ends up on the floor munted

A shop in Brighton that sells Thai furniture does excellent session-tables

by Katherine23 April 27, 2006

table ski

Table skiing is the act of snorting two lines of cocaine in quick succession

Hey dawg I got 4 lines, we can both table ski and take shots.

by Yungjesus420 May 16, 2023

table pancreas

To metaphorically buttfuck someone/something.

"Aww man, I can't believe I had table pancreas happen to me again. :c"

by Kermode the Lemon March 10, 2022