John

a fucking apple

hi apple. my name is john not apple. yes you are don't fucking lie

by jlilxow August 3, 2023

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john

if your friend’s name is john, these definitions aren’t fake!

1. he like boys 101%
2. you like him
3. you love him so much that you save him as “ysc”, “eyes don’t lie”, pillow” etc etc, make up scenarios in your head about john and you cuddling watching a movie together (perferably an anime) and getting all mushy mushy with eachother that you go into a bedroom and you know what happens next and then after that you two fall alseep in bed half naked, and then kidnap him and do crimes to him that would get you in prison for millennials upon millennials, and you bully him.
4. you hate him so much

1. “John obviously likes ______ because he’s always near him!”
2. “I.. think I like John..”
3. …
4. “Omg.. is that John?! He’s soo ugly! I just hate him!”

by the delulu one March 9, 2024

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John Stamos

Your girl most likely told you something like what your mother told you as a kid, if you don't look like John Stamos, you're not going to amount to anything.

Elvis didn't become Elvis because of his outstanding songwriting abilities. He looked like John Stamos, and one thing John Stamos never heard from his mother was that he wasn't going to amount to anything or that he was a fucking loser.

by The Original Agahnim August 17, 2021

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