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Tard Guard

(n.) A device put on top of water bottles to prevent the liquid inside from splashing you when you drink, referred to in the more formal name as a "splash guard". Only a true retard would need a guard to prevent him/her from pouring their drink upon his/herself.
-"OMG dude he just put a Tard Guard on his water bottle!"
-"what a retard!"
Tard Guard by johnsonraymenhymen August 3, 2009
Related Words

tard bean 

having the characteristics of a retarded person. used as public critcism of a stupid or illogical act
(After a person trips over their own feet)
Way to go tard bean!
tard bean by Zachary Meek October 13, 2005
A person who is rather stupid, ditsy, clumsy or a combination of the three. ( This is similar to a Tard Muffin though symtoms come in larger doses.
(something weird happens)
Person A: Wait...... Wha?!?!?!
Person B: Dude, stop being such a Tard Loaf!!!
Tard Loaf by Lainer and Maleria August 22, 2008

Tard Botch 

Retarded Bitch
Man, that chick is such a Tard Botch!
A hybrid word using the terms "Tard" and "Hard-on".
Tard = mentally handicapped or just plain stupid.
Hard-on = excessively strict or severe, not an actual erection.

When the words are combined, you get: a person who thinks they are in charge and are excessively strict and/or severe, however that person is or is border-line mentally handicapped and every ignores him.
John: Oh boy, Here comes Ted.
Ted: No talking during break time! My shoes hurt!
John: Ted, you're such a Tard-on!

tard whistle

The whistle that a retard wears around their neck and blows when they are lost. When you call someone a tard whistle, you are saying they are more retarded then a lost retard.
What's up tard whistle? The most drulling shitting themselves idiot.
tard whistle by retodded retodd December 1, 2010