An absolute fucking retard

you

you are an absolute fucking retard

by boobsburp March 24, 2025

Absolute thunder

The alcoholic mixture of green thunder energy liquid enhancer and absolute vodka

Guy 1 “dam bro I’m tryna get fucked up tonight” Guy 2 “all I got is absolute thunder” Guy 1 “what?!? The mixture of green thunder energy liquid enhancer and absolute vodka?!?” Guy 2 “hell yeah bro”

by Grayson C. Peters July 29, 2021

Absolutely Imperative

Don’t fuck up or else.

Absolutely imperative: You don’t want to know

by tuco_diaz September 30, 2022

Absolute Carrot

An Absolute Carrot is someone who isn't completely tone-deaf, stupid, and arrogant; yet is just tone-deaf, stupid, and arrogant enough to be agitating to others around them. These types of people are just discrete enough to the point where most people who actually interact with them understand they are deeply flawed, however, everyone else thinks that they are a great guy.

Mike: I have no clue why everyone invited Steven to come to Applebees with us, he told a 9/11 joke to the waitress.
Jeremy: Did he really do that? On September 10th? What an Absolute Carrot!

by EliTried December 21, 2021

absolute gronk

Someone who is absolutely a gronk

Norman was an absolute gronk for hoarding all the idlis

by YaboyPK123 July 7, 2023

Absolute boy™️

A guy that is so hot you can't deal. Like, so handsome he is the pinnacle of beauty.

Girl 1:"Have you seen how hot Toshiro Mifune was in Snow Trail?"
Girl 2:"OMG yaas, he's an Absolute boy™️"

by Ginnag98 February 4, 2018

absolutes

The comparison of two items with properties. The first being that one average item trumps the other average item but if both items are "good" then the reverese is true and item 2 becomes better.

grass absolutes turf.

meaning your average turf is better than your average grass pitch but a good grass pitch is better than a good turf.
or
brunettes absolutes blondes.
meaning your average blonde is better looking than an average brunette but a 10/10 brunette is more attractive than the 10/10 blonde

by Oh My Goodness :O December 31, 2024