Office Kermit

this is the office muppet; leaders throughout the organization will try and surround themselves with kermits, people they can influence, pull their strings, play them at times, have them do whatever and whenever they want. The great leaders will strategically have kermits throughout the company in different cross-functional groups so they can rally them, pull them to take complete control. Some kermits are true losers, born that way and will always be losers, others unfortunately find themselves in this role, and often don't realize it until it's too loate ... they were probably promoted into it, possibly given a title, and may even be well paid, or overpaid ...only to serve as a kermit. Saavy leaders will seek out office 7 irons in the company to serve as their future kermits.

Jackson: Did you hear what happend to Lars?
Murphy: No what's up?
Jackson: He's been recruited by Miller?
Murphy: Ooh? To do what?
Jackson: Well after hearing how Lars backed Millers ridiculous idea in the advertising meeting, I'm guessing he is the new office kermit.

by lastgreatnobody March 28, 2009

office married

two people who work together that spend inordinate amount of time together outside of the office.

sharing a cubicle, going to the bathroom together, smoking together, and going to lunch together.

"john and bob are always hanging out together. its like their office married."

by johnandbob October 22, 2009

Office Leapfrog

Usually occurs at work and is started when someone moves out of an office for whatever reason. Now someone wants to move into the recently vacated office because it is better than the one they are in. There is usually a window involved. Then someone else wants to move into the office vacated by the that person.

Dept head: Bob has retired and Tom will be taking his place. Can you move Tom's computer into Bob's old office and move Steve's computer into Tom's old office.

Tech guy: The office leapfrog never stops around this place.

by Kiloh Jonson December 12, 2009

Office Space'd

Verb - Passive Tense

(Note: The active tense version of this is simply Office Space)

Used when someone destroys a piece of (usually outdated) technology for reasons of utter frustrations of trying to get said piece of technology to work.

Made famous in the movie Office Space where three main characters from the movie take their printer, which would constantly display "paper jam" when none could be found, constantly roll paper back and forth between rollers, and display the infamous command PC LOAD LETTER, into an empty field and proceeded to break said printer to pieces with baseball bats.

That scanner was nothing but trouble, so I want and Office Space'd it.

by DarkenPsycho December 15, 2009

Officer Grey Hair

cops who look old beyond their age

you can be OGH'd by having flour thrown in your hair to look like you grey hair

Me: yo i tossed some flour in that pigs hair!
You: Pig got Officer Grey Haired!

by ocn January 7, 2010

office bias

Occurs when a website has a large amount of content that is exclusively relevant to or tilted toward the perspective of office workers, due to the fact that office workers apparently have plenty of time to kill frequenting frivolous, time-wasting websites, like this one.

Examples of office bias on urbandictionary.com are legion and include anything related to offices, faxing, stock trading, elevators, frequent air travel, etc.

by Johnny J. Rockability July 16, 2010

Office Ghetto Neck

The person, or persons in an office that wants to be involved in every little thing, yet never makes a decision, or takes responsibility claiming it’s not their job, or they don’t get paid to do so. As the person is proclaiming this they shake their head around like an angry woman in the ghetto in an argument.

Joey: “we can make this a new standard, just assign it a number and record it.”
Rob: “you can’t just make anything a standard like that, it has to be discussed and approved”
Joey: “you want to take care of that for us Rob?”
Rob: “tsssssk, it’s not my job, I’m not on the standards team”

Tim: "man you see him doing the Office Ghetto Neck?"

by Joey Beef Buicker August 3, 2010