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not the sharpest duck in the china cabinet 

not the sharpest duck in the china cabinet Is an odd variant of “not the sharpest knife in the drawer” and “like a bull in a china shop

It is said that the term originates from the Great Plains/Lower Delta in the Midwest US. Most say the saying came from a notably dumb duck hunter. He didn’t understand the two aforementioned terms “not the sharpest knife in the drawer” and “like a bull in a china shop” but instead of learning what they meant he created the abomination of a saying “not the sharpest duck in the china cabinet” When the poor bastard said it the first time it caught everyone off guard. Everyone in the duck blind stopped what they were doing and begged for further elaboration of the slang term. He refused to elaborate. Without a concrete answer speculation ran wild but no could adequately explain it.

From that point onward the term disseminated across the country. Most people use it ironically for a replacement term. It has caused great confusion and hilarity over the decades
Person 1: did you see that duck dive right into the decoy? That was crazy, it took that damn thing out!
Person 2: yeah that sumbitch is not the sharpest duck in the china cabinet
Person 3: hol up. What does that mean?
Person 2: *refuses to elaborate*
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A duck walked up to the lemonade stand 

and he said to the man running the stand, Hey bom bom bom bom, you're approaching me? the man said "i can't beat the shit out of you without getting closer" then he said HOHO then come as close as you like
Me singing: A duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand, Hey bom bom bom bom, you're approaching me? the man said "i can't beat the shit out of you without getting closer" then he said HOHO then come as close as you like
Friend: is that a jojo reference?
Me: fuck yeah, it's great

Feed the ducks 

1) v. A term used to describe male masturbation. It is often noted that masturbating and feeding ducks involve very similar hand motions.

2) v. The act of giving food to ducks.
I'm going to take a break from all this work, I think I'll go feed the ducks to relieve my stress.
Feed the ducks by JoeDirt January 30, 2003

feeding the ducks 

Aaron said BRB, then proceeded to feed the ducks.

Feed the Ducks 

Jacking it.

Called feeding the ducks because you use a similar hand motion when you feed ducks.
"Your dad was cleaning the pool with his shirt off, so I had to go home and feed the ducks."
Feed the Ducks by Wesnile In Bulk January 10, 2012

feed the ducks 

Code word for any sort of sexual act. This includes masturbating, having sex with anyone, phone sex, cybering, etc, etc.
"I had to feed the ducks all alone."

"Will you help me feed my ducks?"

"The ducks are hungry." (would symbolize being horny)

"I think my ducks are going to die of starvation."

"Oh man, the ducks are STUFFED."

feeding the ducks 

Pulling your plonker with emphasis on the forward stroke.
Stuart: "I caught Joey having a wank on the couch last night."

Jeff: "Was he spanking the monkey or feeding the ducks"