Closet Heterosexual

A straight man/woman who pretends to be gay with the hope of sleeping with a member of the opposite sex, playing on the possible fantasy of "converting" them.

Girl: How do you know you don't like women if you've never slept with one?
"Gay" Guy: I don't know. I never really thought about it.
Girl: We should totally fuck.
"Gay" Guy: Well... I guess I could *try* it, sure. ;)
*30 minutes later*...
"Gay" Guy: Yeah so, I'm actually a closet heterosexual and just wanted to get in your pants.

by Burnt Coffee October 31, 2008

metrosexual

When a blind person thinks you're straight, and a deaf person thinks you're gay.

My grandma told me I look gay, but my sister told her I'm just metrosexual.

by a humble sage January 7, 2010

Aggressively Heterosexual

When someone is so heterosexual that it seems to have its own aura. You know that they’re heterosexual simply by looking at them and it is so invasive and aggressive you can’t ignore it.

e.g Frat boys, dudes who wear sports jerseys and shorts in blizzards, Kyles etc.

David: Look at that guy over there.
Jamie: Damn he’s so aggressively heterosexual. He just oozes “bro”.

by Bitch Chigga March 25, 2020

petrosexual

A term used to describe a person who is obsessed with cars.

A person who spends every spare time with their car. E.g. John washes his car every day. John may be petrosexual

by bp_me November 14, 2005

Latent Heterosexual

A person who later in life is sexually attracted to persons of the opposite sex. Or a person who at a late age, has sexual relations with the opposite sex. Colloquially known as "almost straight."

For many years Sammy played with himself, and then suddenly, Betty with the two left footed children came into his life, and helped him understand that he was a latent heterosexual.

by jeffbo May 25, 2009

Heterosexual distance

The physical and psychological distance a non gay man needs to keep to another man at all times. (May vary depending on the situation)

Facebook update:"I'm (male) lying listening to my friend farting in his sleep".

No homo! You need to keep your heterosexual distance man!

by Ovinor January 12, 2011

Metrosexual

A straight man that WAIT FOR IT.........can shop for himself and is concerned about how he looks.

Redneck dude: what are you, a fuckin queer?

Metrosexual guy: Just because I look better than you doesn't mean you have to be an ass.

Redneck dude: *glares and walks away*

Actual gay guy: mmmm well aren't we manly standing up for ourselves. *tries to make a move*

Metro guy: sorry dude I'm not gay.

Gay guy: wow you had me fooled!

Metro guy: that is an amazing jacket!

by thunder156 April 8, 2009