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factsturbate

v: To willfully distort, ignore, or fabricate factual material in order to serve one's selfish ends, e.g. deceiving others
Trump's tendency to factsturbate constantly when speaking to the public makes those with a firm grip on reality swell with anger.
by geblergenschmoof October 20, 2016
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Facts in disguise

Facts that everybody knows but keeps quiet.
“Dude Brandon is such a dick.” “Yea everybody knows that but nobody ever says it that’s facts in disguise.”
by Alienboobs February 8, 2020
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All facts no fib

When all you got is facts and there is no possibility of any fibbing whatsoever.
Bro: "bruh this grilled cheese is fucking bomb"
Me: "hell yeah bro, all facts no fib"
by Wagwaninator October 30, 2019
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bucking the hard facts

A saying coined by Paul G. Hewitt, author of Conceptual Physics, which describes the disregard of an established law or fact.
"Meteorologists try their best, but they are bucking the hard facts of chaos in nature."
by RMKU November 21, 2013
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flatscan

One who does not understand computers, or one who harbors a deep-rooted dislike for computers or the Internet.
From the X-Men term "flatscan", a derogatory term for non-mutants. As the mutants considered themselves the next step in human evolution, "flatscans" were those who would be left behind as the world progressed. A similar fate awaits those who dislike or cannot comprehend computers, and the cyber community adapted the term to mean non-cyber rather than non-mutant.
Flatscans generally need to call tech support for such complicated steps as opening Microsoft Word, and never remember to check their email.
by Clay January 11, 2005
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factsplaining

fact·splain | \ ˈfact-ˌsplān

\

factsplained; factsplaining

Definition of factsplain
transitive + intransitive

: the uninvited and condescending effort of a third party (usually, though not always, on social media platforms) to offer extraneous information (“context”) or further explanation on a given subject/topic, while invariably posing itself as objectively factual, despite its content and purpose invariably being the promotion or defense of a partisan (progressive, leftist) idea, premise, value, cause, figure, etc.

It is often characterized by cloaking subjective opinions and partisan perspectives amidst the excessive use of officious-sounding terms and declarations such as “Ruling” “Context” “Evidence” “Credible” “Finding” “Determination” “Conclusion” “Result”, etc. or may strive to confirm or deny information on the basis of mere nuance, minor technicalities, irrelevancies, or other specious rationale.

In both form and content, factsplaining attempts to discredit the original information, although rarely if ever actually doing so, and its presence therefore may best be understood as a strong indicator of the original content’s truth or accuracy.

Prominent factsplainers: Factcheck, Politifact, Snopes, Reuters, AP

See also: bias, propaganda, spin, gaslighting, censorship, partisanship
“I shared that post about Bernie Sanders owning 3 homes, but the factsplaining said it wasn’t true - his wife actually is actually a co-owner as well…”
by Norm Al Cybias April 27, 2021
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Dead facts

Agreeing to something
Boy: Yo this bitch always wearing the same shoes and her hair look ratchet asf
Friend: Yo thats dead facts bro
by Xanarchy October 21, 2017
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